How to get a shag

[Cliphead]

In my experience of course...

Play;

Spanish guitar
Hyperspeed tenor banjo
Bluegrass mandolin (marginal)
Whatever current smoochie hit on guitar

........

Bulgari Aqua
Chanel Anteus
Write her a tune
Have it performed by a major orchestra
Find it quickly and well...

Cook
Wash up
Pay for everything
Loads more

Add yer own...

[EternalOptimist]

In my experience of course...

Play;

Spanish guitar
Hyperspeed tenor banjo
Bluegrass mandolin (marginal)
Whatever current smoochie hit on guitar

........

Bulgari Aqua
Chanel Anteus
Write her a tune
Have it performed by a major orchestra
Find it quickly and well...

Cook
Wash up
Pay for everything
Loads more

Add yer own...

be a bird

[scooterscot]

Or just listen to what they have to say

[kingcook]

Add yer own...

Have a shower, then hand over £150.

[Cliphead]

Or just listen to what they have to say

That would be a first. Ever

[kingcook]

be a bird

...wearing lycra leggings with G-strings.

[scooterscot]

That would be a first. Ever

Your still a virgin?

[MaryPoppins]

In my experience of course...

Play;

Whatever current smoochie hit on guitar
...

[Cliphead]

Of course you've never been in the company of a professional

[EternalOptimist]

A tangent here.


When I was a lad, it quickly became apparent that the birds had something. The blokes would try every trick in the book to get it off them. get them pissed, flattery, pay them , etc

Now I am pretty sure, that in other times and places, it has been the other way around, and birds were hot in persuit of the fells.


why the fck oh lord, have you condemned me to live here and now ?