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Have YOU ever done anything unhygienic

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    #31
    Originally posted by cojak View Post
    I'm sure you're aware that that urine comes out at body temperature. When I was kayaking during the winter I used to regularly warm up my hands by weeing on them (after I had my sarnies, obv...).

    It kept chillbains at bay as well...
    Before I write this one please note tha it doesn't come under the heading of kinky.

    Picture, if you will, the setting. It's 1998, in the Firth of Clyde. I've been on a drift dive with some friends where we're coming to the end of the dive and slowly surfacing.

    One of our number - a young and quite good looking female - surfaces into the tentacles of a jellyfish. As you might guess, is one gets jellyfish tentacles on the face, they sting a bit. I've never heard someone scream underwater before.

    Now, having inflated this ladies BCD on the surface and got her to the boat (we're about 6 miles offshore), we've no vinegar aboard (one of the two most appropriate methods for the removal of jellyfish stings is to cover it in vinegar - it goes through plasmolysis and dies, falling off).

    Ladies and gents, I commend to your imagination a picture that would normally likely grace the content of some reasonably hardcore adult entertainment.

    Female, still wearing her drysuit and mask, and with regulator in mouth, lying along centre-line of RIB (rigid inflateable boat).

    Four males (a journalist, a professor of marine biology, a BBC cameraman and a statistician) standing in a circle around the head of said female, drysuits around ankles, pissing on her face.

    The jellyfish stings fell off but it became a story that we decided that we would never discuss amongst us ... almost a "what happens at sea, stays at sea" situation.

    Comment


      #32
      Originally posted by The Lone Gunman View Post
      Standard wet suit practice isnt it? Divers smell like old people.
      Oi! As a diver, I resemble that remark!

      Comment


        #33
        Originally posted by Rookie View Post
        A little extreme! There are clubs for that kind of thing, surely? Couldn't you have just stuck them in your armpits or down your trousers, cojak?
        Not sure about kayakers, but it's fricking difficult in a dry suit!

        Comment


          #34
          Originally posted by Menelaus View Post
          Oi! As a diver, I resemble that remark!

          I are an ex diver too. Adult onset asthma put an end to my diving. I can still do it, but cant get the insurance for any of the clubs.
          I am not qualified to give the above advice!

          The original point and click interface by
          Smith and Wesson.

          Step back, have a think and adjust my own own attitude from time to time

          Comment


            #35
            Originally posted by Menelaus View Post
            Before I write this one please note tha it doesn't come under the heading of kinky.

            Picture, if you will, the setting. It's 1998, in the Firth of Clyde. I've been on a drift dive with some friends where we're coming to the end of the dive and slowly surfacing.

            One of our number - a young and quite good looking female - surfaces into the tentacles of a jellyfish. As you might guess, is one gets jellyfish tentacles on the face, they sting a bit. I've never heard someone scream underwater before.

            Now, having inflated this ladies BCD on the surface and got her to the boat (we're about 6 miles offshore), we've no vinegar aboard (one of the two most appropriate methods for the removal of jellyfish stings is to cover it in vinegar - it goes through plasmolysis and dies, falling off).

            Ladies and gents, I commend to your imagination a picture that would normally likely grace the content of some reasonably hardcore adult entertainment.

            Female, still wearing her drysuit and mask, and with regulator in mouth, lying along centre-line of RIB (rigid inflateable boat).

            Four males (a journalist, a professor of marine biology, a BBC cameraman and a statistician) standing in a circle around the head of said female, drysuits around ankles, pissing on her face.

            The jellyfish stings fell off but it became a story that we decided that we would never discuss amongst us ... almost a "what happens at sea, stays at sea" situation.
            ROFLMAO.

            Post of the week.
            Hang on - there is actually a place called Cheddar?? - cailin maith

            Any forum is a collection of assorted weirdos, cranks and pervs - Board Game Geek

            That will be a simply fab time to catch up for a beer. - Tay

            Have you ever seen somebody lick the chutney spoon in an Indian Restaurant and put it back ? - Cyberghoul

            Comment


              #36
              Originally posted by Menelaus View Post
              Four males (a journalist, a professor of marine biology, a BBC cameraman and a statistician) standing in a circle around the head of said female, drysuits around ankles, pissing on her face.
              Was it Miranda?
              ‎"See, you think I give a tulip. Wrong. In fact, while you talk, I'm thinking; How can I give less of a tulip? That's why I look interested."

              Comment


                #37
                Originally posted by Moscow Mule View Post
                Was it Miranda?
                Nope.

                No names, no pack drill.

                Comment


                  #38
                  Originally posted by Menelaus View Post
                  Before I write this one please note tha it doesn't come under the heading of kinky.

                  Picture, if you will, the setting. It's 1998, in the Firth of Clyde. I've been on a drift dive with some friends where we're coming to the end of the dive and slowly surfacing.

                  One of our number - a young and quite good looking female - surfaces into the tentacles of a jellyfish. As you might guess, is one gets jellyfish tentacles on the face, they sting a bit. I've never heard someone scream underwater before.

                  Now, having inflated this ladies BCD on the surface and got her to the boat (we're about 6 miles offshore), we've no vinegar aboard (one of the two most appropriate methods for the removal of jellyfish stings is to cover it in vinegar - it goes through plasmolysis and dies, falling off).

                  Ladies and gents, I commend to your imagination a picture that would normally likely grace the content of some reasonably hardcore adult entertainment.

                  Female, still wearing her drysuit and mask, and with regulator in mouth, lying along centre-line of RIB (rigid inflateable boat).

                  Four males (a journalist, a professor of marine biology, a BBC cameraman and a statistician) standing in a circle around the head of said female, drysuits around ankles, pissing on her face.

                  The jellyfish stings fell off but it became a story that we decided that we would never discuss amongst us ... almost a "what happens at sea, stays at sea" situation.

                  Oh yes, the old "what happens at sea, stays at sea" scenario...

                  <cough>
                  "I can put any old tat in my sig, put quotes around it and attribute to someone of whom I've heard, to make it sound true."
                  - Voltaire/Benjamin Franklin/Anne Frank...

                  Comment


                    #39
                    Originally posted by cojak View Post
                    Oh yes, the old "what happens at sea, stays at sea" scenario...

                    <cough>
                    <splutter> ?
                    Hang on - there is actually a place called Cheddar?? - cailin maith

                    Any forum is a collection of assorted weirdos, cranks and pervs - Board Game Geek

                    That will be a simply fab time to catch up for a beer. - Tay

                    Have you ever seen somebody lick the chutney spoon in an Indian Restaurant and put it back ? - Cyberghoul

                    Comment


                      #40
                      Originally posted by Menelaus View Post
                      Four males (a journalist, a professor of marine biology, a BBC cameraman and a statistician) standing in a circle around the head of said female, drysuits around ankles, pissing on her face.
                      I would hardly call four guys standing in a circle , peeing on a birds face unhygienic.


                      (\__/)
                      (>'.'<)
                      ("")("") Born to Drink. Forced to Work

                      Comment

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