What does retirement look like for you?

[vetran]

Unfortunately all this is easier said than done when you're on your own. I'd happily go out for the day somewhere that Rach wasn't that interested in when she was alive, because at the end of that day there was someone at home to talk to later about the day, and what you saw. Not quite the same when you walk in the front door and the house is empty, and all you can talk to is a photo on the wall.

And travel alone again is not as easy as it may seem when you're so used to travelling with someone else and sharing the experience. The guilt alone that I'm seeing something new/interesting or whatever and Rach can't is hard to cut through.

This is not a pity party, it's just the way things are for many new widows. It gets easier apparently, but the 'firsts' are always the hardest.

One reason I've gone back to work full time is to put some structure back into my life after all the years of caring; some familiarity. With structure will come the ability to do things alone, then when I am ready to find a different path then it should be less of a shock to the system.

My father was the same decades ago when we lost my mother. He has mostly recovered and is happy with my step mother.

I completely understand, just sharing what worked for him. He did enjoy the solo travelling and yes it wasn't the same but it was better than throwing himself into work to the exclusion of all else.

[cojak]

Been here for years for me.

Do lots of walking. Outdoor volunteer stuff - maintaining local open access areas, footpath inspections and repairs for council. Old fart stuff - art group, karaoke. No writers club since our leader croaked unfortunately. Trips with loony old lady friends.

I like doing IT, spent ages doing walking map thing based on Bing Maps API, loads of features. Currently doing new payment system on small business website. Not sure what I'll do when that's finished.

And I’ve been learning how to use walking map based things, as well as brushing up on my paper map based skills.

I’m fitter than I’ve been in years.

[MuffinBomb]

Si I retired at 57 (just before pandemic) and enjoying it just fine. My wife had retired a few years earlier so we do spend a lot of time together.

Thoroughly enjoy not having to get frustrated with poor decision making of clients and I can do what I want when I want - bliss.

I've been able to focus more of my time on my grandson (which is so enjoyable), running (did my second marathon after a gap of 39 years) and actively managing my SIPP (up 20% this year). I get to go to the cinema during the day and follow whatever political or sports is in focus. I've signed up for a volunteering scheme to go alongside the small amount I already do and I do some informal mentoring with a friend still attending "day prison".

I'd have liked to have travelled mire than I have in the last 24 months but despite the complete incompetence of this government I expect to be able to in 2022.

[mudskipper]

Unfortunately all this is easier said than done when you're on your own. I'd happily go out for the day somewhere that Rach wasn't that interested in when she was alive, because at the end of that day there was someone at home to talk to later about the day, and what you saw. Not quite the same when you walk in the front door and the house is empty, and all you can talk to is a photo on the wall.

And travel alone again is not as easy as it may seem when you're so used to travelling with someone else and sharing the experience. The guilt alone that I'm seeing something new/interesting or whatever and Rach can't is hard to cut through.

This is not a pity party, it's just the way things are for many new widows. It gets easier apparently, but the 'firsts' are always the hardest.

One reason I've gone back to work full time is to put some structure back into my life after all the years of caring; some familiarity. With structure will come the ability to do things alone, then when I am ready to find a different path then it should be less of a shock to the system.

I've holidayed alone a few times.

Depending on your interests, I recommend Intrepid's tours - you join a group of like minded people pursuing whatever activity it is you're into.

I joined their tours for hiking the Inca Trail and cycling in Cuba on my own. Even travelling alone before joining the tour group you meet so many people - and there are an amazing number on their own. One of my most enjoyable days in Peru was on my own when I went to explore some stuff and met a French lady who was also there on her own. Give it a go - nothing to lose

[Whorty]

I've holidayed alone a few times.

Depending on your interests, I recommend Intrepid's tours - you join a group of like minded people pursuing whatever activity it is you're into.

I joined their tours for hiking the Inca Trail and cycling in Cuba on my own. Even travelling alone before joining the tour group you meet so many people - and there are an amazing number on their own. One of my most enjoyable days in Peru was on my own when I went to explore some stuff and met a French lady who was also there on her own. Give it a go - nothing to lose

Yep, these are on my radar for next year too ... either a cycling tour in SE Asia or like you a trek in S. America.

Thanks for the post

[courtg9000]

I'm fairly late to this thread.
I retired at age 45 on ill-health grounds just under a year ago. I simply had no choice.
Quite a few people here know how bad the health is.
Financially i'm just about ok. Nothing too bad.
The thing I struggle second most with is avoiding daytime telly! Been rather successful so far!
The biggest thing is that I still miss my work more, the work, the punters, even being stuck in a traffic jam on the M25 at 7.30 in the morning! That's the real git.
Nesrest thing I get to work is updating my own website.
True, I can't physically do the work anymore but its probably the biggest issue for me.

[silent bob]

This is a difficult one for me.
I've done my sums and I should be fairly comfortable if I retire at about 60. So that's been my plan.
However, when I've had time on the bench in the past, after the first couple of weeks have past, I start to get really bored.
My plan is to join a golf club and get more golfing time. We love walking, so plenty of that as well.
And lots and lots of travelling. Loads of things we've not tried before, like a cruise, narrow boat, hire a motorhome etc etc
Another option would be to scale back on the contracts to maybe work 6 months of the year.
I just can't decide what the best option will be for me

So as you can see from the above, I've still got no idea at the moment....

[woohoo]

Just re-watching office space (in the background) as I'm working. The main guy is asked what he would do if he had a million dollars and he said nothing, just nothing, all day.

I'm the laziest person I know and that's my dream. It aint much but it's an honest dream that a man can aspire to.

Office Space - If I had a million dollars - YouTube

Looking to semi-retire in the next couple of years, looking to move house and downsize the house but more land.

[Whorty]

This is a difficult one for me.
I've done my sums and I should be fairly comfortable if I retire at about 60. So that's been my plan.
However, when I've had time on the bench in the past, after the first couple of weeks have past, I start to get really bored.
My plan is to join a golf club and get more golfing time. We love walking, so plenty of that as well.
And lots and lots of travelling. Loads of things we've not tried before, like a cruise, narrow boat, hire a motorhome etc etc
Another option would be to scale back on the contracts to maybe work 6 months of the year.
I just can't decide what the best option will be for me

So as you can see from the above, I've still got no idea at the moment....

I think, for me too, the 6 months on/6 months off may be my edging into retirement too. I'm like you, not good at being bored.

But that may change as time goes on and if I find a partner .... who knows!

[DaveB]

A few years to go for me yet till the pension kicks in. Planning on getting as much as possible into that and the warchest in the mean time, close the Ltd pay off the last of the mortgage and set up a micro-brewery with the proceeds.

If it works I have a retirement hobby that I can work at as and when I want to, that could bring in a bit of cash, keep me occupied, keep me dealing with people and give me an excuse to visit loads of pubs to flog the beer. If it doesn't I'll just drink it and pickle myself for future preservation

In between spend the rest of the time travelling to peer at ancient ruins with Mrs B. and maybe find a bolt hole somewhere hot and sunny to spend a few months a year.