• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Like Demi Lovato my preferred pronouns are also they/them. Not because I am non-binary but because I choose to identify as multiple people.
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      I just saw katie price coming out of the fishmonger with a whole trolley full of salmon, haddock and kippers. Then she walked around the park collecting up dog tulip.

      I think she is copying Gwyneth Paltrow's idea, and making some candles that smell like her vagina
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        Bilbo was surprised to wake one morning, and find that a Tesco had been built right next to his house.
        It was an unexpected item in the Baggins area.
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          That pie smells so good I jizzed in my pants...

          I guess you could say I came to my senses.
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            Me: “Excuse me, are these ‘genetically modified’ carrots?”
            Grocer: “No, why do you ask?”
            Carrot: “Yeah, why do you ask?”
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              What has McDonalds and a red light got in common?

              My wife always drives through them.
              Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

              Comment


                My boss pointed out today that I only seem to get sick monday to Friday.
                I told him it must be something to do with my Weekend immune system.
                Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                Comment


                  You're either non-binary or you're not.
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    Originally posted by vetran View Post
                    What has McDonalds and a red light got in common?

                    Cyclists always drive through them.
                    FTFY



                    Comment


                      Soldier Potato Head was distinctily worried about being transferred to a MASH unit.
                      Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X