So a third of the kids in this country are starving. And a third of the kids in this country are obese... sometimes the solution to a problem is just right there!
- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
Please put more jokes here
Collapse
X
Collapse
-
-
Most of us know the late Michael Hutchence as the bloke who was in INXS
Whereas to Bob Geldof he's the bloke who was IN HIS EXAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
I had a dream I was swimming in a lake of orangeade,But it was just a Fanta SeaAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
I see Netflix are going to pay David Beckham 16 million pounds for his life story.Netflix are thinking of screening it in the commercial break of Coronation Street.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
Apparently, if you can taste paper or cardboard you have the dreaded Covid-19.
Well, I must apologise to my wife for all the insults of her rather bland cooking, it seems I've had this virus for forty three years.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
I had habit of eating paper at school. Got told off for chewing edges off text books.bloggoth
If everything isn't black and white, I say, 'Why the hell not?'
John Wayne (My guru, not to be confused with my beloved prophet Jeremy Clarkson)Comment
-
The wife’s been complaining about getting blisters on her hands from using the broom...
I don’t understand why she didn’t just take the car! ??*♂️Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
"Stiles is dead."
"Yes!"
"Nobby, not Harry."
"Oh, ****."Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
I refuse to wank off to porn magazines, I only like digital stuff.
None of that non-binary tulip for me.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
Knock knock
-Who’s there?
Dishes
-Dishes who?
Dishes the ghost of Sean Connery.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- Streamline Your Retirement with iSIPP: A Solution for Contractor Pensions Sep 1 09:13
- Making the most of pension lump sums: overview for contractors Sep 1 08:36
- Umbrella company tribunal cases are opening up; are your wages subject to unlawful deductions, too? Aug 31 08:38
- Contractors, relabelling 'labour' as 'services' to appear 'fully contracted out' won't dupe IR35 inspectors Aug 31 08:30
- How often does HMRC check tax returns? Aug 30 08:27
- Work-life balance as an IT contractor: 5 top tips from a tech recruiter Aug 30 08:20
- Autumn Statement 2023 tipped to prioritise mental health, in a boost for UK workplaces Aug 29 08:33
- Final reminder for contractors to respond to the umbrella consultation (closing today) Aug 29 08:09
- Top 5 most in demand cyber security contract roles Aug 25 08:38
- Changes to the right to request flexible working are incoming, but how will contractors be affected? Aug 24 08:25
Comment