Originally posted by MaryPoppins
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Things I want to know
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Originally posted by DimPrawn View PostI normally run my posts through a spell checker, but seeing you were the audience, I didn't feel the need.
Practically perfect in every way....there's a time and (more importantly) a place for malarkey.
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Originally posted by MaryPoppins View PostI can understand the fart thing, but the rest is jibba jabba.
"When it is cold outside and you fart, can you see it like you can see your breath?
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John of the UK said, "Farts expelled in cold air leave what can only be described as a long bushy
tail. This is quite funny waiting on a train station platform on a cold dark frosty morning. A person will move away from everyone to a safe distance, and then release a long quiet fart, only to have a sudden and dramatic long bushy white tail coming from their anus; it goes down a little way and slowly curves up ending in a point, just like a dogs tail!"Comment
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Originally posted by k2p2 View PostWMPS. Please can we stay on topic?
"When it is cold outside and you fart, can you see it like you can see your breath?
...
John of the UK said, "Farts expelled in cold air leave what can only be described as a long bushy
tail. This is quite funny waiting on a train station platform on a cold dark frosty morning. A person will move away from everyone to a safe distance, and then release a long quiet fart, only to have a sudden and dramatic long bushy white tail coming from their anus; it goes down a little way and slowly curves up ending in a point, just like a dogs tail!"Bazza gets caught
Socrates - "The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."
CUK University Challenge Champions 2010Comment
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Originally posted by k2p2 View PostWMPS. Please can we stay on topic?
"When it is cold outside and you fart, can you see it like you can see your breath?
...
John of the UK said, "Farts expelled in cold air leave what can only be described as a long bushy
tail. This is quite funny waiting on a train station platform on a cold dark frosty morning. A person will move away from everyone to a safe distance, and then release a long quiet fart, only to have a sudden and dramatic long bushy white tail coming from their anus; it goes down a little way and slowly curves up ending in a point, just like a dogs tail!"Practically perfect in every way....there's a time and (more importantly) a place for malarkey.
+5 Xeno Cool PointsComment
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Originally posted by MaryPoppins View PostI really hope it's freezing cold tomorrow morning, I need to test this out. I'm deeply appreciative of your research into this subject, k2p2.What happens in General, stays in General.You know what they say about assumptions!Comment
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Originally posted by MarillionFan View PostSo what's the thing with farting and red eye then?
I'm sure k2 will provide some information around that. In the meantime:
How can one cover up a fart?
There is a company called Fartypants that sells underwear designed to absorb the odor of farts. If you should be caught without your Fartypants, another ploy is to blame the dog or cat, if one should be present, or complain about how the wind must be blowing from the direction of the paper mill.
As for the sound... if you are in a large group of people, act oblivious and innocent, or glance quickly at the person next to you, as if you think he/she did it. Other strategies include coughing or suddenly moving your chair so that people think that they misheard the fart. If you are with one other person, you can act as if nothing happened, and the other person may believe he was mistaken in thinking he heard a fart.
CJT addresses the problem of farting loudly in a public restroom as follows: "My solution: use a handful of loose toilet paper, cover your butt hole and it will muffle the farting; my friends and I call it the 'Buff Muff'!"
Depending upon the company, another strategy is not to cover it up, but to proudly proclaim the fart as your own grand accomplishment and to issue a challenge to the others to outdo that one if they think they can.Practically perfect in every way....there's a time and (more importantly) a place for malarkey.
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Originally posted by MaryPoppins View PostThe farting on someone's pillow thing, you mean?
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So who's a silent farter and who's loud and proud? Will this be Wilmslows thread for tomorrow? Will Gricer let one rip on the train? Will Mary follow through?
All this and more on tomorrow's episode of General.What happens in General, stays in General.You know what they say about assumptions!Comment
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