Originally posted by DaveB
View Post
- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
test please delete
Collapse
This is a sticky topic.
X
X
Collapse
-
-
Comment
-
-
Originally posted by NickFitz View PostAnd under some circumstances (which I haven't worked out)Comment
-
Originally posted by BrilloPad View PostWhen someone makes an intelligent remark in general?Comment
-
Originally posted by BrilloPad View PostWhen someone makes an intelligent remark in general?
Specifically.
There's the first visit to YeOldeNewe Sloughe of Desponde done and dusted.
My room looks much the same as it did.
Managed to recover a couple of things I forgot: my spirit level (knock once for yes, knock twice for no), and my single transistor on a wafer device that's wandered around with me for the last 30 or so years and which remained unregarded in a plastic bag marked "Transistors" which is used to show the uninterested esteemed customers wtf a transistor looks like.
All the boxes out of the lab have been moved elsewhere on the instructions of the new "head of skool" who actually isn't head of skool since that's been abolished but is now a PL.When the fun stops, STOP.Comment
-
Originally posted by ladymuck View PostDrove down to West Sussex to visit the parentals...
Drove through a fake tunnel being constructed for No Time To Die, then headed down to a vineyard for a couple of days.
It’s a good job admin pays for these mod holidays...…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
-
Originally posted by WTFH View PostDrove through a fake tunnel being constructed for No Time To DieComment
-
Originally posted by NickFitz View PostA fake tunnel? Was it one of those ones the coyote paints on a rock face with a sign pointing at it saying "BIRD SEED THIS WAY"?
Comment
-
Originally posted by greenlake View Post
Wile E Coyote was Acme's only customer. That's why the company had such poor quality control, they for some reason banked all their hopes on a single hungry desert dog
Acme was founded by the elon musk of its day.
"Guys. Get this. We're gonna sell rockets to a dog."
"we're going to sell rockets to dogs?"
A dog, Greg. A dog out in the desert. We're gonna disrupt the tulip out of this market. Who's with me?!
"But"
No buts, you piece of tulip. I want a rocket-powered pair of rollerskates on my desk by three or you're fired.
The team gingerly unveils a 10 ton anvil with a rocket crudely duct-taped to it.
1940's elon musk giggles, continuously, for a solid 5 minutes.
"Oh yes, boys, he's gonna love this. Ship it."
A year later, Acme now consists of 1940's elon musk and three car mechanics from Brooklyn.
They spend their time smoking pot and pondering about small dogs in the vast desert. Sometimes they mail a rocket to the middle of that desert.
Meanwhile, Wile E Coyote, brain enhanced due to nuclear fallout from nearby atom bomb tests, thinks this is all completely normal. The poor dog has no idea his entire lifestyle is one man's deranged dream.
Wile E Coyote, laboriously using a pen in his ungainly dog paws to scrawl a mail-order for a can of vantablack paint, thinking to himself how incredible capitalism is and how humans take it for granted.
Meanwhile, at Acme:
1940's elon musk: what if *takes a hit* we sell him painted tunnels.
Vinnie: how do you paint tunnels?
1940's elon musk: you jackass. He paints the tunnels. We just sell the paint. Unimaginably dark paint.
Somewhere in the vast austere majesty of an eroded desert, there exists a small mutated dog whose entire concept of capitalism is the product of 1940's elon musk feverdreaming about rockets"Being nice costs nothing and sometimes gets you extra bacon" - Pondlife.Comment
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- Autumn Budget 2024: Reeves raids contractor take-home pay Oct 31 14:11
- How Autumn Budget 2024 affects homes, property and mortgages Oct 31 09:23
- Autumn Budget 2024: Reeves raids contractor take-home pay Oct 31 09:20
- Autumn Budget 2024: Umbrella companies hit, Employer NICs hiked, and BADR heading for 18% Oct 30 16:54
- Autumn Budget 2024: chancellor’s full speech Oct 30 16:34
- RecExpo got told this about Labour’s Employment Rights Bill… Oct 30 09:10
- A limited company just got one over HMRC on VAT; here’s how Oct 29 09:24
- Business Account with ANNA Money Oct 28 15:51
- Top 5 Autumn Budget areas for IT contractors to tick off Oct 28 09:30
- Top 5 umbrella company expenses things to still do in 2024 under 2016's T&S rules Oct 24 08:21
Comment