• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    Hundreds have cats have come forward saying they have been abused at the hands of premier league footballers.

    The RSPCA have called it the #meow too movement.
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      What's the difference between the met police, Caitlyn Jenner and Katie price?

      Only two of them have managed to get rid of a useless dick.
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        When I first began dating my wife, she said she wanted "a man with conviction."

        Since she left me for a prolific armed robber, she now has "a man with convictions."
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          What do we want?

          Zouma sacked!

          When do we want it?

          Miaow!!
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            What do you call three rastafarians in a boat with harpoons and half a ton of ganja?

            Bob Marley and The Whalers
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              The wife just said she thinks I must be a woman trapped in a mans body, because once a month I become argumentative and emotional for a few days.


              I had to explain to her that it's just the time of the month......... WHEN HER HUGE CREDIT CARD PAYMENTS COME OUT OF OUR JOINT ACCOUNT !!!!!
              Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

              Comment


                Kurt Curiosity Zouma
                Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                Comment


                  "Adidas ends sponsorship deal with West Ham defender Kurt Zouma over cat-attack video"

                  I bet that's the most expensive pussy he's ever had.
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    Why did the cat cross the road?

                    It saw Kurt Zouma.
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment


                      Kurt zouma is starring in a remake of a classic pantomime;...........

                      Boots in puss.
                      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X