I can't blame Messi...I'd be crying if Barcelona stopped paying me a million a week too!
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Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. -
The local music shop was bugled last night. They took all the brass instruments.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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For perfect burgers every time cook them on a George Formby.
They've turned out nice againAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Grandad didn't mind if people came round while he was working
Lovely man, tulip anaesthetistAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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10 mins after drinking an energy drink I started mincing and angrily shouting abuse at strangers.
I should really lay off the GaytiradeAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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How did the hacker evade the police?
He just ransomware!Comment
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My wife's weird, last week she said she wouldn't mind if I had a tattoo, today she's complaining about all the bagpipers in the garden.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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So let me get this straight. Prince Andrew is being prosecuted in the United States for having underage sex with a 17-year-old girl........in Ghislain Maxwells House.........In Belgravia, London, because if it was prosecuted in the UK, she is legally allowed to have sex, so no case to answer.
Does this also explain why they wanted to prosecute Anne Sacoolas in the UK, because in the US driving on the wrong side of the road and killing a motorcyclist is perfectly legal.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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What's the difference between a torpedo and a priest? The "tor" bitAlways forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Did you hear about the millipede who had sex last night?
He got his leg over, leg over, leg over, leg over, leg over......Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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