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Please put more jokes here

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    The Chav's Lord's Prayer


    Our Father, who art in prison, even mum knows not His name, thy chavdom come, you'll read The Sun, in Exmouth which is in Devon, give us this day our welfare bread,and forgive us our ASBOs, as we happy slap those who got ASBOs against us, lead us not into employment, but deliver us free housing, for thine is the chavdom, the burberry and the Bacardi, for ever and ever.


    Innit
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      Lockdown 3 is starting to affect me. I have just re-installed Windows XP, just to remind myself what the outdoors look like. The green grass, the blue sky. Outdoors mmmm
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        I passed the river the other day and this guy asked me if his rod looked good. He then asked if I liked his net. Then asked if I was impressed by the amount of fish had caught.


        Then I twigged. He was fishing for compliments.
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          Me : Can I borrow the new book about Cockney swearwords?
          Librarian : You can't.
          Me : Yeah, that's the one.
          Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

          Comment


            I always said that if I ever won on the lottery that I would share it with you all on here.


            So I'd just like to share that I've won on the lottery
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              Billy Joel was asked in an interview if he had sampled the lobster from the Seafood Restaurant near his home.
              He replied..."I haven't been there for the Langoustine."
              Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

              Comment


                Help the BBC with their new nationwide campaign against paedophilia...


                ....quit paying the Licence Fee.
                Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                Comment


                  I was walking out of the hospital when this scruffy looking scrote asked "any change, pal"


                  No, He's still in intensive care, I replied.
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    Just bought a load of old railway buffers on eBay for a bargain price. It was an end of line sale.
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment


                      I think I had a really good time last night.


                      I'll let you know after I finish reading the police report.
                      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                      Comment

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