Dear ITV, my friend just committed suicide after watching Piers Morgan on Good Morning Britain Your move
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Please put more jokes here
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Following the cancellation of Jeremy Kyle due to the risk of future suicides sky sports have announced they will not be showing Manchester United games next season.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Originally posted by vetran View PostFollowing the cancellation of Jeremy Kyle due to the risk of future suicides sky sports have announced they will not be showing Manchester United games next season.
Mo Salah's daughter has scored more goals at premiership grounds this season than Alexis Sanchez
…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Be warned, if your bank says you have an "outstanding balance" it might not be the great news it first seems.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption.
One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named Amal. The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him Juan.
Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Amal.
He responds: "They're twins. If you've seen Juan, you've seen Amal."
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WHAT IS WRONG WITH PEOPLE????
A LADY FOUND MY PHONE ON A CHAIR RIGHT BESIDE ME AT MCDONALD'S - LITERALLY 15 SECONDS AFTER I LEFT IT THERE.
I WATCHED HER POCKET IT.
SHE TRIED KEEPING IT!!
I KEPT TAPPING HER ON THE SHOULDER TO TELL HER TO GIVE IT BACK BUT THIS IDIOT DENIED HAVING IT!!
THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING...
A BIGGER IDIOT KEPT TAPPING.... See more…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Hindu, Muslim & Scouser go to Madrid for the final. Apartment owner meets them to let them in... there are only 2 beds.. guy says I have a barn down the road, one of you is welcome to stay there ..”
Hindu says, “I’ll take the barn, no worries”
30 mins later , knock at the apartment door, it’s the Hindu “Sorry, I can’t stay in the barn there’s a cow in there”
Muslim guy says “Ok I’ll take the barn”
30 mins later , knock at the apartment door, it’s the Muslim, “Sorry, I can’t stay in the barn there’s a pig in there, I can not sleep with a filthy swine there”
Scouser says “Ok, I’ll take the barn”
30 mins later, there’s a knock at the apartment door ... it’s the cow & the pig.....Comment
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