I fancied a game of hungry hippos.
So I went to the weight watchers meeting and threw a pack of maltesers on the floor.
So I went to the weight watchers meeting and threw a pack of maltesers on the floor.
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Today a lady told me that my smile is utterly infectious. Fair enough, she's a doctor and it's because I have herpes but I'll take it.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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I have already shown them what they are missing!Originally posted by BrilloPad View Post
Tell them I am Busy on the third Saturday but we can switch to Sunday, keep the Mondays, Tuesdays & Thursdays.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Some kids trick or treating just turned up at my door dressed as Gloria Gaynor.....at first I was afraid. Then I was petrified.!!!!!!!“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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A biologist, a chemist and a statistician are out hunting.
The biologist shoots at a deer and misses 1 metre to the left.
The chemist takes a shot but misses 1 metre to the right.
The statistician shouts "yes, we got him!"…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Helium walks into a bar and orders a beer.
The bartenders says "Sorry, we don't serve Noble gases in here"
He doesn't react.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Quick reminder for insomniacs everywhere:
3 more sleeps till Christmas.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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CYCLOPS: How do you spell Hawaii?
WIFE [biting lip] well..you need 2 i's
CYCLOPS [puts pen down] my life is just a joke to you isn't it Linda?“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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What have Las Vegas and Scunthorpe got in common?
They are the only two places in the world where you can pay for sex with chips…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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