Yuletide marriage guidance

[MarillionFan]

However, it would be nice if he, just occasionally, said something that wasn't a criticism.

You're not as fat as you used to be.

[eek]

Don't be surprised if she doesn't fancy nookie tonight. (Or ever.)

Nookie? I assume you don't mean

[eek]

He "arranged" the fridge. I put the butter back on the wrong shelf.

Is there a map. If not insist on him drawing one.

[Old Greg]

I've put up with him for 23 and a bit years - I'm holding out for my long service award.

Because it's worth it.

[Spacecadet]

I've put up with him for 23 and a bit years - I'm holding out for my long service award.

All you'll get is a badge and a new pair of marigolds

[barrydidit]

At this time of forced proximity to our nearest and dearest, here's a few hints and tips for you gentlemen.

1) Think about the ratio of positive to negative things you say to your partner

If all you've said over the last two days is:

You've loaded the dishwasher wrong
The brussel sprouts could have done with a bit longer
You've cross threaded the lid on the cranberry jelly
Did you have to put the sandwich toaster there?
You're treading mud into the carpet
Who finished the toilet paper and didn't bring a new one up?
You've put the butter back in the wrong place
You've tipped the Pringles sideways
Can you shut the door? You're always leaving it open

They sound much more like girly complaints.

+1 Except the dishwasher one. I've heard loads of arguments from different couples re the female partners inability to stack the thing in an order that means the machine can do it's stuff.

[doodab]

+1 Except the dishwasher one. I've heard loads of arguments from different couples re the female partners inability to stack the thing in an order that means the machine can do it's stuff.

Although frankly anything beats leaving a pile of tulip in the sink for me to sort out. And when it's full, PUT THE ******* THING ON!!

[suityou01]

His first mistake was interfering. Leave all domestic duties to MS and all be will bliss.

[Spacecadet]

Although frankly anything beats leaving a pile of tulip in the sink for me to sort out. And when it's full, PUT THE ******* THING ON!!

Simpler if its left in the sink, otherwise it means unloading the badly loaded dish washer, then reloading it and pointing out to the Mrs that it IS ONLY HALF FULL if it's loaded properly.

I think it's time the curriculum at girls schools was updated to include some of the more modern appliances which their little brains clearly struggle to deal with unless properly instructed.
Ironically these things were invented to save THEM time if they used them properly

[mudskipper]

It's a dishwasher, not a friggin' game of tetris.