Divorce

[DBA_bloke]

Be thankful that you aren't crossing swords with Heather McC!

[lukemg]

Be thankful that you aren't crossing swords with Heather McC!

Well, if I had £800 million, although I would want the beeatch to sweat for it, I would still expect to sustain a reasonable lifestyle if I had to bung her 50 mill.
Alas, for large numbers of married men who get divorced we are talking a major kicking in standard of living, possibly bedsits, large debt etc. Yes, there is usually a good reason why the mum gets the kids + the house and it ain't no picnic for her either most times.
Perversely, contractors/self-employed have got some ability to manipulate their financial 'picture' to try to resist getting totally turned over but at the end of the day, you want the kids to live somewhere nice and if that means you take a step down then think you have to do it.
Have to feel sorry for any bloke edged out of his own house, which he is still paying for, because missus got bored and scored elsewhere. 3 months on, his kids are calling another chap dad, who has his feet up watching his plasma, drinking ale cooled by first blokes fridge !

[chef]

Have to feel sorry for any bloke edged out of his own house, which he is still paying for, because missus got bored and scored elsewhere. 3 months on, his kids are calling another chap dad, who has his feet up watching his plasma, drinking ale cooled by first blokes fridge !

that is THE most depressing and annoying thing i've read all day..

[ratewhore]

Plenty of sage advice here, or is there? Speaking as someone who has been through this in the last couple of years here is my tuppence worth:

You have to show your accounts
All the company money is considered your personal asset and added to your 'wealth'
50/50 will not happen, particularly with children
District judges are, in the main, clueless and also lean in favour of the wife

I could be more detailed and, if you want more info, feel free to PM me

My advice, pay her off and move on. This advice is from someone who ran down the bank balance of my Ltd and still had to pay thousands.

Thankfully I'm a lot more relaxed about it now...

[DBA_bloke]

Have to feel sorry for any bloke edged out of his own house, which he is still paying for, because missus got bored and scored elsewhere. 3 months on, his kids are calling another chap dad, who has his feet up watching his plasma, drinking ale cooled by first blokes fridge !

I think I'd be hard-pressed not to go a bit mental, invest in a shotgun, and use it to bloody, hate-filled effect on the bastards.

[NickFitz]

I think I'd be hard-pressed not to go a bit mental, invest in a shotgun, and use it to bloody, hate-filled effect on the bastards.

Can you expense the gun and cartridges? Would an umbrella co's dispensation cover that?

[TheFaQQer]

Can you expense the gun and cartridges? Would an umbrella co's dispensation cover that?

My dispensation covers everything - just claim it.

[Gonzo]

My dispensation covers everything - just claim it.

You're lucky. Mine said that I couldn't claim them because they would be covered in the £45 a day that I can claim for being away from home for more than 5 hours.

[TheFaQQer]

You're lucky. Mine said that I couldn't claim them because they would be covered in the £45 a day that I can claim for being away from home for more than 5 hours.

Unlucky - mine has no limit on anything, as long as it's approved by another employee.

[chef]

I think I'd be hard-pressed not to go a bit mental, invest in a shotgun, and use it to bloody, hate-filled effect on the bastards.

Disclaimer: If this advice is taken I want to make it very clear to all press that I wholeheartedly disagree with this advice and think DBA in no way reflects the views of myself, other contractors, humans, lizards or daleks (where are they? they've been very quiet recently, makes me a bit nervous) .. yes I have played Manhunter, yes i like tarrantino films and yes i thought Bowling for Colombine was an interesting doc..