Shock News

[Board Game Geek]

Your biological parent produced you, your real parents CHOSE you

Very true Cojak (and Burdock) and that really does put things in to perspective. Amazing how such a simple sentence had me blubbering for the best part of a hour.

At least we were both lucky to find people to love and care for us

Absolutely...I could have grown up in a London Children's Home, as opposed to growing up in a rural cottage. And I realise how lucky I have been, compared to some who never had that choice.

Thanks everyone for letting me bounce some ideas and thoughts around, you've all provided me with some food for thought. I was looking earlier on the net about those involved in adoption (as an adoptee or adopter), and apparently the figure is a high as 1 in 10 ! That doesn't seem right, but if it is, then I am stunned.

[xoggoth]

Commiserations Geek. No idea how that would feel. Fancying myself as a cold blooded rational my inclination is to say it would make no difference and would not bother me at all. In practice I have found emotions can take their own line completely and can run over you like an express train. Reminds me of something I found out a few years back and I find I still can't bear to think of it.

[Sockpuppet]

No one is thinking about this contractor stylee. The chance to get two lots of inheritance!

[Gonzo]

No one is thinking about this contractor stylee. The chance to get two lots of inheritance!

[Diver]

Gonzo you are about as subtle as a brick in the face

And sockpuppet be ashamed

[Gonzo]

Gonzo you are about as subtle as a brick in the face

Well that's me told.

I have been quite impressed that there have been nothing but constructive comments on this thread so far, but there comes a time when normal service must be resumed. BGG has been around here long enough to know what we are like.

[cojak]

Amazing how such a simple sentence had me blubbering for the best part of a hour.

I do have that effect on people, just ask Diver...

[SallyAnne]

Hi BGG,

You must have so many emotions going on at the moment - how on earth are you coping?
I hope you have a source of hugs around you

I think if I found out my folks weren't my real parents, I'd love them even more. What an act of complete selfnessness to take you in and raise you as their own. They must be really amazing people.

Do you have any idea why they are telling you this now? (I hate to even think it, but your first instincts of "is someone ill" might still be true - you may actualy have more emotional heartache to come You may have to prepare yourself for this)

Regarding your birth mum...I would imagine there hasn't been a day gone by since she gave you up, that she hasn't thought of you. Evey single day you'll have popped into her head, and every birthday too. But I think you need to give yourself a timeframe before you decide on whether to contact her or not - give yourself 6 months or something. You cant be expected to make a good decision now, let alone be in any fit state to meet her now!

You are very lucky, and you must always remember that. But you are also entitled to be upset, emotional, angry, irrational, judgemental and even a little bit crazy right now! Dont think you have to be this stiff upper lipped, take it on the chin, chap! Let out every emotion you are having, and dont bottle anything up - even if it's just venting through this board.

I wish you every luck in the world honey, and we're all here for you if you need to talk anymore.

[Diver]

I do have that effect on people, just ask Diver...

[Charles Foster Kane]

Seriously: Speak to those close to you about this. Semi-anonymous-never-met-in-your-life contractors: no. Good luck, though.

Nah, your Mum should have taken you on the Jeremy Kyle show

Seriously though, that is quite heavy (I know everyone on the bulletin board is thinking 'could I be adopted?').