Contractor wisdom that you live by <one liners only>

[BlasterBates]

A contract is like a Mercedes. Sometimes it just doesn't start.

[northernladuk]

A contract is like a Mercedes. Sometimes it just doesn't start.

A contract is like a Mercedes, it can end abruptly, as if it had hit a brick wall.

[Largely Ginny]

A contract is like a bus. You wait for ages and then 2 come along at once

[SueEllen]

First day on site (is that still a thing?) prioritise finding the nicest loo on the premises

No.

F*** what does an office full of people look like?

[TestMangler]

Any hole is a goal.....

[BlasterBates]

Did you hear the one about the contractor working in a gardening centre. His contract ended prematurely due to a celery dispute.

[GigiBronz]

Any hole is a goal.....

pardon me for asking but what kind of work do you do?

[NotAllThere]

It ain't over until the fat cheque clears.

You mean Robert Maxwell?

[milanbenes]

where there's chaos there's cash

Milan.

[NotAllThere]

I asked ChatGPT.

As an IT contractor, I don't have a boss, I have clients who pay me to tell them what to do.