Infatuation attack arrgh!

[BrilloPad]

I think it might be partially time of year related. Days are drawing in.

I wish there was a magic cure for depression!

[CoolCat]

OK, so for the past 12 months my mental health has been fine. I've accepted that I'm not an alpha male, that it is difficult, as someone with autism/aspergers or whatever, to form relationships. But in my life I've had bouts of depression. I've also had bouts of a kind of pining for a partner, in terms of a relationship. What would you call this though - is it a type of infatuation? Not infatuation with a particular person, but an infatuation with the idea of having a relationship. Well it has come on all of a sudden.

I don't know why this has come on suddenly? It is moderately unpleasant, and is creating anxiety. And I don't want it to relapse my depression, because it might force me to bail out of my current gig, which would fairly majorly inconvenience the end client.

Has anyone else experienced anything similar? Or am I a big girlie with no strength.

I probably shouldn't post stuff like this online.

Sorry for the rant.

Some quite famous successful people with aspergers, Gary Numan springs to mind, so it is possible to have that condition and still find your way in life. As for "pining for a partner" I've had that now and again when I've been single, on its own that for me is normal. Anxiety/Depression I dont know, I dont know enough about you to comment, if its debilitating then seek help. The world these days does label things as "depression" which in my view are normal, eg a terminally ill friend was labelled as "depressed" by his doctors when he and I thought that was nonsense and he was just cheesed off about dying FFS which I found extremely normal.

Sorry I am not much help, but good luck.

[CoolCat]

Just go on a few tinder dates, you will soon see how bat tulip crazy most woman are and the idea of a relationship will soon be gone

I have no serious advice


Sent from my iPhone using Contractor UK Forum

lol brilliant comment

[CoolCat]

Welcome to the human condition. Even Peter Pan cannot deny the flow of time.

Reading your text reminded of Jordan's lecture, a very worthwhile 10 minutes:

yes jordan had done several good videos with comments on this

[DaveB]

Get well soon

What MS Said.



The fact that you are lucid about what's happening and can have some objectivity is a positive sign. Take that and use it.

[Old Greg]

This.

Yes, it might be hormonal. It certainly has adrenaline in the mix.

Thing is, as I've said, I'm no alpha.
In life there are winners, and losers. It's part of evolution. Through possibly no fault of my own, I'm not on the winning side.
There are lots of things going through my head, not all of which I have put on here.

Please don't buy into this alpha / winner bulltulip. Well done for sharing. Here is my advice

Firstly, enlarge Brillo's avatar and put it in a photo frame on your work desk as a reminder that the grass in the other side can be covered in Doberman tulip.

Secondly, try to make the most of what you do have socially, which j understand can be tricky with Asperger's. Make the most, if you can, out of the freedom you have to do what you like, whether that is exercise, going down the pub or whatever. If you are isolated try to get out as much as you can to get some kind of contact with people. Tricky with both anxiety and depression.

Can't help with dating. Last time I was dating it involved bartering with the next village's shaman using beads and flint axe heads.

Take care.

[NotAllThere]

FWIW, I know quite a few aspergic, and quite a few "non-alpha" males who've made perfectly adequate relationships.

[GJABS]

FWIW, I know quite a few aspergic, and quite a few "non-alpha" males who've made perfectly adequate relationships.

Agreed. And I need to be careful not to let the fact of my aspergers/autism become an excuse to not doing anything it to try to remedy it. It is an obstacle, not a barrier.

I'm feeling better today. Thanks again for the messages of constructive support.

[BrilloPad]

Can't help with dating. Last time I was dating it involved bartering with the next village's shaman using beads and flint axe heads.

I thought beads might help me get a wife who would stick around. Of course, you can guess the result....

[BrilloPad]

Agreed. And I need to be careful not to let the fact of my aspergers/autism become an excuse to not doing anything it to try to remedy it. It is an obstacle, not a barrier.

I'm feeling better today. Thanks again for the messages of constructive support.

Hope to see you back on TOTP soon.....