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Tumbleweed moment

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    Tumbleweed moment

    I was in a restaurant last night. Fairly early on, so it was quite quiet.

    A family come in and the owner recognises them and greets them with enthusiasm.

    "Ahh. Hello, hello. So good to see you again. Granny not with you today?"

    "Err, no. She's dead"


    Silence........................................... ............

    #2
    That's a good reason not to bring her.
    Knock first as I might be balancing my chakras.

    Comment


      #3
      Worst one I did was in the not-so-PC nineties - I was telling a very homophobic joke to one of the lads in the Health and Safety office when I suddenly realised his co-worker (also listening with baited breath for the punchline) on the next desk was the office gay (they were rare back then).

      I had to do the 'ooh, I forgot the ending...' thing....

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by stek View Post
        Worst one I did was in the not-so-PC nineties - I was telling a very homophobic joke to one of the lads in the Health and Safety office when I suddenly realised his co-worker (also listening with baited breath for the punchline) on the next desk was the office gay (they were rear backed then).

        I had to do the 'ooh, I forgot the ending...' thing....

        Comment


          #5
          Originally posted by stek View Post
          Worst one I did was in the not-so-PC nineties - I was telling a very homophobic joke to one of the lads in the Health and Safety office when I suddenly realised his co-worker (also listening with baited breath for the punchline) on the next desk was the office gay (they were rare back then).

          I had to do the 'ooh, I forgot the ending...' thing....
          In my first job in the 90's, the head of IT (Dave) was a gay man. A group of us went to the pub, and one of my colleagues (Rob) got the drink order in - "5 pints of best, 2 pints of lager ... and an orange juice? An orange juice? Who's having the pouff's drink?"

          "That'll be mine," says Dave.

          Cue Rob's mortification, everyone else falling about laughing.
          Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

          Comment


            #6
            Mine was taking about my contract and laughingly described it a 'in the land of the blind the one eyed man is King!', only to realise half way through this comment that one of the group had a glass eye...
            "I can put any old tat in my sig, put quotes around it and attribute to someone of whom I've heard, to make it sound true."
            - Voltaire/Benjamin Franklin/Anne Frank...

            Comment


              #7
              I remember New Years eve in Blackpool once seeing a slim girl in a nice LBD sporting a bump. Cue pissed guy sidling up and saying how nice she looked and how pregnancy can make a woman bloom. 3 second silence as she looked down, looked back at me... Then slapped me round the face....
              'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

              Comment


                #8
                I did once comment (as a contractor) that I'd never hire someone if I knew they didn't read books. One of my colleagues piped up that he hadn't read a book for years. oops

                It was later pointed out to me by the manager that a) they wished they hadn't hired him and b) he was an external and wasn't having his contract renewed.
                Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by stek View Post
                  Worst one I did was in the not-so-PC nineties - I was telling a very homophobic joke to one of the lads in the Health and Safety office when I suddenly realised his co-worker (also listening with baited breath for the punchline) on the next desk was the office gay (they were rare back then).

                  I had to do the 'ooh, I forgot the ending...' thing....
                  Did that back in the mid 80s but was a joke about disabled kids to a guy I found out had a disabled daughter. I though his reaction was a bit cool. Fair play to him for not kicking off
                  'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by northernladuk View Post
                    I remember New Years eve in Blackpool once seeing a slim girl in a nice LBD sporting a bump.
                    I see why some people here think that you are a racist chav

                    Comment

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