What's the difference between vetran and my septic tank?
My septic tank isn't full of tulip. (I expect to tell the same joke in 2 years time and may even use this post as a reminder as to when I last had it emptied)
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Reply to: Please put more jokes here
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Previously on "Please put more jokes here"
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Didn't know Alexei was their new driver?
James May 'was rushed to hospital after crashing into a wall at 75mph during filming for the Amazon Prime show' The only thing to improve this episode would be if Clarkson were in the passenger seat.
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I don?t think the Man Utd WAGs have anything to worry about. I've not seen a bunch of men play away so badly in my lifetime.
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I've almost finished my A to Z of Lionel Richie songs, but I'm stuck on u.
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Lots of people in my meditation class have complained about the teacher so now he has been referred to the ommmmmmmbudsman.
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PopeyewithnoSpinach
*Password is not strong enough*
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It’s my wife’s birthday in a couple of weeks and she’s been leaving jewellery catalogs all over our house.
So I've taken the hint and got her a magazine rack.
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I opened 3 birthday cards yesterday and I feel so grateful for all the money I received.
Being a postman has such great perks.
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I feel so lucky to have my sheepdog because good ones are hard to come-bye.
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one for Warty:
I walked in the pub with my missus and the barman said, "Punching above your weight there aren't you, pal? Where did you find her?"
"I met her in Thailand," I replied. "We're due to get married next month."
"You don't want to get married," he said. "That's when the blowjobs stop."
"I don't mind that," I replied. "I hate giving them to her
anyway."
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I've had a brilliant idea, where illegal immigrants have to hunt down child molesters for a chance to win citizenship.
It'll be called aliens vs predators
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The Verve are playing a gig at our dilapidated village hall.
It will have to be an acoustic set though, because the plugs don't work.
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Originally posted by vetran View PostI'll never date a mime again, they're just too quiet in bed.
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