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Previously on "Please put more jokes here"

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  • vetran
    replied
    I went to meet this bird i had found on Tinder. As I approached her house, she open the door in her negligée.

    'That's a funny place to have a door!' I thought.

    Leave a comment:


  • xoggoth
    replied
    One of the few jokes on Quora I found funny (being a rude old git)

    Three engineering students were gathered together discussing the possible designers of the human body.
    One said, 'It was a mechanical engineer. Just look at all the joints.'
    Another said, 'No, it was an electrical engineer. The nervous system has many thousands of electrical connections.'
    The last one said,
    'No, actually it had to have been a civil engineer.
    Who else would run a toxic waste pipeline through a recreational area?'

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    Would you like me to spell condescending for you?

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    Would you like me to spell condescending for you?

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    I heard aliens are gender neutral. They/them are out there.

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    When I was younger,my body was a temple..... Now it's a flaming bouncy castle.

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    Click image for larger version

Name:	66332d3caeab0_1tgfa9a5xur41__censored__700.jpg
Views:	63
Size:	150.0 KB
ID:	4289178

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    You know who really makes me cross?


    The lollipop lady.

    Leave a comment:


  • NotAllThere
    replied
    Originally posted by vetran View Post
    American reboot of the Thomas the Tank Engine series has modern animation.

    Thomas is black, gay, 40 stone and carries an assault rifle.
    And prefers to be called Esmerelda.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    Apparently St. George was made a saint for having the courage to stand up to a big scary dragon.

    Fair play to the fella, I tried that once and had to spend the next 6 months in the spare room.

    Leave a comment:


  • Paddy
    replied
    Twelve years ago, my friend Chris came running out his room with emotional tears shouting "it's a boy, it's a boy!" He went on to say that he will never return to Thailand.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    The person who stole my diary has just died.


    My thoughts are with his family.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    What's the stupidest animal in the jungle?



    The polar bear.

    Leave a comment:


  • WTFH
    replied
    Fun fact: If Celine Dion sang only the vowels in her name, it would be in the lyrics to Old McDonalds Farm.

    Leave a comment:


  • vetran
    replied
    There's a new Indian restaurant opening in Bradford called The Giant Peach.

    Their specialty is rolled daal.

    Leave a comment:

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