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Previously on "Have you ever been Set up ?"

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  • crack_ho
    replied
    Originally posted by scooterscot View Post
    yes. At school wee James introduces me to the wonders of masturbation behind the bike shed. It was amazing. 'But be careful he says, you only get a 100 of these' he tells me to count every one. So In my little black book I've got a detailed record.

    Years later...

    I tell yeh I've never been so frightened in all my life come my 101'st attempt.
    Extract from the Diary of Scot...

    1) 1983 - cracked one off at the launch of Lisa
    2) 1984 - cracked one off at the launch of Lisa 2
    3) 1985 - cracked one off at the launch of Macintoss 128K
    ...
    ...
    ...
    101) 2009 - cracked one off at the launch of Snow Leopard

    Leave a comment:


  • scooterscot
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    I was just wondering if anyone here knows of any cons , or even been set up themselves


    yes. At school wee James introduces me to the wonders of masturbation behind the bike shed. It was amazing. 'But be careful he says, you only get a 100 of these' he tells me to count every one. So In my little black book I've got a detailed record.

    Years later...

    I tell yeh I've never been so frightened in all my life come my 101'st attempt.

    Leave a comment:


  • NotAllThere
    replied
    Sitting in a hotel bar with a colleague. After a few jars, we went into the dining room. I started on an anecdote and noticed he was looking at me strangely. "What's the matter," I asked? You told me this story just an hour ago".

    Total mental freeze-up, until the bastard started laughing at me...

    On another occasion, I arrnaged to meet up with a contractor I used to work with, in a London pub. A certain "MsAngry" from another place was there as well, as she and I worked through the same agency at the time, and there was one of the earliest PCG meeting taking place that evening. Anyway, I digress. Jim arrived with a copy of the Times under his arm. "Hey", I said, "Can I have a look at your paper, I've not done the crossword today". He looked at me sceptically. "You can do the Times crossword?". "Of course I can," I said, "it usually takes me 10-20 minutes, so I'm not that good". "If you can do it in 15 minutes I'll buy a bottle of champagne". "You're on", I said.

    So, we sat chatting, drinking our pints, and I'd look at the paper, and fill in the clues, a few at a time. 15 minutes later, I put the completed crossword under his nose. "Champagne time, I think".

    What he didn't know was that I was on a govt contract, where we had f.a. to do, and usually spent the morning completing the crossword together... Trouble is, I'm too honest, so let him off the hook went he got up to go to the bar.

    Leave a comment:


  • BrilloPad
    replied
    I once once asked to call C Lion at a phone number. But I guessed it was LOndon Zoo.

    One bank I worked for got a female intern to call a broker and ask for a quote on a Norweigan diving company called MUF.

    Leave a comment:


  • RichardCranium
    replied
    Story from Chris the cabbie.

    Chris used to own a fruit & veg stall. Each week he paid his wholesaler, Harry, for the week's stuff he'd bought. While he did so, he left his long-standing sidekick, Sam, in charge of the stall.

    One day Chris returns from paying Harry the wholesaler and sidekick Sam says "I paid Harry the wholesaler". Chris asks for an explanation.

    Just before Chris was due back, Some Random Geezer had approached Sam and said:

    "Hi, you must be Sam. I'm Harry the wholesaler. Chris just called me. He's been held up and said I should give you the bill for the wholesale."

    Some Random geezer then hands over an itemised bill titled "Harry the Wholesaler Ltd" requesting roughly the right amount of money for a week's wholesale.

    Sidekick Sam then gives Some Random Geezer the morning's takings (cash) to cover the bill.

    Although Chris the cabbie was cross, looking back he says he is very impressed because Some Random Geezer had done a fair bit of research to carry out the scam.

    Leave a comment:


  • KentPhilip
    replied
    Originally posted by SuperZ View Post
    A little off topic but during my younger years, the days of late nighters before travelling back to work digs on a Sunday, I arrived back in Berkshire late on a Sunday night. I was really tired due to few late nights over the weekend. I got off the train and started walking through town to get to my shared house that the company I was working with had put me up in. With heavy bags hanging off me shoulders I came across a scruffy git in the street who seemed pissed but harmless enough. He said "hey mate, have you got 20pence so I can call a taxi, I`m not well and need to get home". So I checked my pockets and found a £1 coin if I remember correctly (it wasn`t 20pence anyway). So I said, "no mate, I`ve only got a quid and you`re not having that". Then I thought and then asked "have you got change". He said "yeah" and rumaged around and gave me 80pence change . I was wondering why he was looking at me strangely. Anyway I took the 80pence and walked off before about 10 mins later I realised.....duhhhhhhh. He needed 20pence to make a phone call but had 80 pence to exchange for my quid
    Ah but you see he knows he made an excellent investment for that 80p for himself in combination with all his homeless mates - in that for the rest of your life you've been so guilty about that incident that you've been giving them money every time you pass a homeless person.

    Leave a comment:


  • conned tractor
    replied
    I got done a kipper at one place. Started at one place, where I knew a few of the staff anyhow, got given desk, phone, etc. Whenever I called someone the number wasn't right and I kept on dialling wrong numbers. They even got me with "try my number, xxxx", to which someone random irate person answers, who has obviously been called a few times before. The barstards had re-arranged the keys on the telephone in a manner that you just can't see it.

    One of the people there had got married and on his return they fudged the numbers on his phone and when he figured it out then swapped his phone over with the phone on the empty desk - which I ended up occupying shortly after. So they then stitched me up a treat with it.

    Leave a comment:


  • SuperZ
    replied
    A little off topic but during my younger years, the days of late nighters before travelling back to work digs on a Sunday, I arrived back in Berkshire late on a Sunday night. I was really tired due to few late nights over the weekend. I got off the train and started walking through town to get to my shared house that the company I was working with had put me up in. With heavy bags hanging off me shoulders I came across a scruffy git in the street who seemed pissed but harmless enough. He said "hey mate, have you got 20pence so I can call a taxi, I`m not well and need to get home". So I checked my pockets and found a £1 coin if I remember correctly (it wasn`t 20pence anyway). So I said, "no mate, I`ve only got a quid and you`re not having that". Then I thought and then asked "have you got change". He said "yeah" and rumaged around and gave me 80pence change . I was wondering why he was looking at me strangely. Anyway I took the 80pence and walked off before about 10 mins later I realised.....duhhhhhhh. He needed 20pence to make a phone call but had 80 pence to exchange for my quid

    So that was a kind of set up

    I`ve done a set up in the workplace before, enabling me to get out of a permie job offer I wasn`t sure about, giving me the chance to laugh my arse off in a meeting with HR when they withdrew the offer ,while later receivng a 20grand pay rise as a contractor due to the whole thing . It`s quite funny watching the expressions on HR droid faces when you suddenly break out laughing during a serious meeting with them - you can see the deep thought on their faces (why is he laughing)
    Last edited by SuperZ; 4 September 2009, 09:18.

    Leave a comment:


  • d000hg
    replied
    Originally posted by MrMark View Post
    I bought what I thought was a cheap printer. Turns out it needs 4 separate ink cartridges that run out at different times, and the printer won't function unless every cartridge still contains some ink.
    Same here, the replacement ink costs more than a new printer.

    Leave a comment:


  • EternalOptimist
    replied
    Originally posted by Bagpuss View Post
    I was set up for a crime I didn't commit, I escaped a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, I survive as soldier of fortune.
    heh heh

    good one

    Leave a comment:


  • Bagpuss
    replied
    Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Post
    I watched the film 'The Sting' again recently, it's still pretty good, but it's not usually the baddies who get set up.
    I was just wondering if anyone here knows of any cons , or even been set up themselves



    I was set up for a crime I didn't commit, I escaped a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, I survive as soldier of fortune.

    Leave a comment:


  • MrMark
    replied
    I bought what I thought was a cheap printer. Turns out it needs 4 separate ink cartridges that run out at different times, and the printer won't function unless every cartridge still contains some ink.

    Leave a comment:


  • PinkPoshRat
    replied
    I took a car into Kwik(s)hit and they said I needed;

    2 x Front tyres
    2 x Front brake pads
    2 x Front brake discs
    2 x Front brake calipers (one of which had seized...........?)

    total £630 plus VAT

    so I then took same car to a 'Green Flag' approved garage and was told

    only need the 2 front brake pads. They also fixed a caliper bolt which had been left loose (by Kwik(s)hit))

    Real cost £90 all in

    Leave a comment:


  • cojak
    replied
    Originally posted by milanbenes View Post
    I know someone who was hired into a bank as a big manager

    their first task on joining was to be part of a restructuring programme and fire some people

    seems that the people he fired had friends in high places and quite soon afterwards he got fired

    the bank got what they wanted

    guess he was setup

    Milan.
    He was stupid then - Machiavelli recommends doing that. Some people specialise in that, they get paid a wodge knowing that they will be publicly fired themselves once they get the job done.

    Your mate should be thankful that he didn't get cut in two and have both halves dumped at either end of the piazza...

    Leave a comment:


  • thunderlizard
    replied
    Originally posted by sal626 View Post
    In Istanbul, a few years ago…this kid came up selling a Guide book for $10…..we were actually planning to get one, but I had been advised that “street merchants” should be haggled with, so I brought him down to $8. He accepted grudgingly giving us the usual sob story , etc. Couple of hours..later I peeled off the $10 price label to show the actual price of $3 printed on the book. Still makes me smile….
    That kid's a recruitment agent now.

    Leave a comment:

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