Reply to: Should I stay or should I go (to America) ?

[Platypus]

DECISION MADE.

After another long conversation with GFP, I've decided to stay in the UK.

A sincere thank-you to you all for your thoughts, which really have helped.

The world (of IT) is definitely not my lobster, let's hope that things work out on the personal front.

At least I'll remain a contractor, albeit most likely a soon-to-be-unemployed one.

[d000hg]

In the US you get 2 weeks holiday a year

And basically no sick pay (not sure of the details).


It's almost like being a contractor

[BlasterBates]

Texas is a great place, to go on holiday.

In the US you get 2 weeks holiday a year,

No way would I move to the US, my 1 week working in California made it clear to me, it's a gr8 place to visit. You will spend most of your time in the USA boxed in a cubicle, and the rest of what little time you have left trying to sort out every day chores. If you are lucky enough to be in a sky scraper at least you can look out the window from time to time.

US.....big NO.

[DimPrawn]

Biggest danger is client-co sound like hard nosed s.

You dump GF, move to USA, they dump you there (easy with US employment laws) and you're left with nothing.

[scooterscot]

you're a keeper

[Scruff]

2a for definite. Texas seems like a dream to me. Gas Monkey BBQ & Grill, V8 Trucks and Steak. Air-conditioning beats the heat!

[MaryPoppins]

Are you not getting enough?

Why are you asking?

[BrilloPad]

I read that as 'penis', which was confusing.

Are you not getting enough?

[jamesbrown]

I'd do it for the experience (or, rather, have done). I lived in the north east US for several years, and I'd say it's a great opportunity. There are nice parts of TX too. For example, DFW is quite nice (great music scene), and the TX hill country is great. There's nothing quite like a road trip in the US (and you could almost spend your life doing them). Might be something of a culture shock, though, if you're not a regular visitor already, and you'd need to get used to the climate there.

[I just need to test it]

Wherever you go you'll take your problems in their various forms with you. But hey.

Dallas in Feb was far too hot for me. The bugs terrified me.

Though I did find the Dallas women generally fabulous (not that I partook).

[MaryPoppins]

spends his time alternating between rearranging his pens into neat rows on his desk

I read that as 'penis', which was confusing.

[sal]

If GFP isn't prepared to wait or go long distance, sadly she isn't the one. IMHO.

If you are thinking seriously of straying - ditto.

picturing & putting it in the fantasy bank is allowed.

^This, in regards to choosing based on feelings. If GFP really cares about you beyond the physical relationship she will understand that going to US is not only the best thing for your career but probably the only thing. If you both want the relationship to develop further the best choice would be to give the US a go while maintaining a long distance relationship for a couple of months. If you don't like it - terminate the contract and come back to UK, if you do like it, get GFP over to US for a week show her around and see how she feels. If she doesn't like it then you will have to make the hard choice but at least armed with more information about the work/live side of things. This will allow you to separate the decision to move/don't move to US and dump/not dump GFP.

OTOH if GFP is not willing to wait for 3 months so you can test the waters in US, this should be enough of a confirmation how serious is she about your relation.

[d000hg]

I've also read that almost all of Texas is privately owned land. If you accidently trespass, it is the owners legal right to shoot and kill you. So don't think of wandering around in the countryside.

I'd have thought that would be something you'd approve of.

[MaryPoppins]

I'm 98% sure ClientCo will terminate my contract if I decline the job. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned.

I'm inclined to think that could end up being a blessing in disguise.

[DimPrawn]

Not been there but many colleagues visited Dallas back when I worked for Texas Instruments. They reported climate less than ideal. *Extremely hot*. Also Houston also extremely humid. In winter they have "ice storms" that can deposit an inch of ice on your car.

Yes my understanding is it can be very very hot, or very cold with ice storms, mostly very dry, lots of tornados to keep you on your toes.

Not what you would call a perfect climate by any stretch.

I've also read that almost all of Texas is privately owned land. If you accidently trespass, it is the owners legal right to shoot and kill you. So don't think of wandering around in the countryside.