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But... have you ever thought of just escorting them from the premises?
I used to do the glass & piece of card trick, but not in this house. The buggers are teleported in faster than I can eject them. One of the buggers I chucked out of the front door was back in before I was! It turned and ran between my legs, up the step and in the door as I watched.
At the back we have fields. The prevailing wind is from the back. This allows the alien octopeds to be beamed straight into the house using their monomolecular teleport strings.
We've had big transparent buggers.
We've had long-leaded buggers.
We've had red and white bodied big round buggers.
We've not got brown & yellow buggers.
I can suck up anything up to 20 hideous little monsters using my Special Agent Issue 1300W Hoover (with the long range hose and nozzle adaptor) in one assault; the Glass 'n' Card squad just cannot deal with this kind of mission.
It's tough out here on the Alien Octoped Invasion front lines, people, it's real tough.
NF ejects a spiddy and gets his 'compassionate relief'.
Xoggoth chucks out one and gets his rough and wicked way with his Missus.
I eject, squish, kill, maim and generally permanently dispose of scores of the buggers, and all I get is "There! Another one!" and shuddering.
Kill one spider and it's a tragedy of erotic proportions. Kill millions and it's just What he Does.
What was that Western where the bounty hunter has killed more men than the men he is rounding up, until the people come to hate him more than the villains? (Could it have been 'The Bounty Hunter'?)
I'm the Inspector Javert of spider hunting. Devout, committed. Never truly known. Unloved.
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