test please delete

[realityhack]

Emergency over

I just found

Some 25 year old

rum

in

the cupboard

it beats the bottle of famous grouse that's been there since time began as it's so utterly foul. And I'm not going to appreciate the Armagnac in this state

[BrowneIssue]

ROTFL

Legend, pure legend.

Any more excruciating stories??

Like the morning I woke up still drunk from the night before (a far too regular occurrence over the past 25 years) and pulled my shoes on to find I HAD thrown up in the night after all?a

That was a MacD's as well.

Completely wrecks a pair of shoes, that does. Even when there is nothing visible on the outside. Rotted in days, they did.

[Diver]

ROTFL

Legend, pure legend.

Any more excruciating stories??

Once went to a posh crowded restaurant. to impress a new girl, had Lobster.

Squirted lemon in my left eye, jerked my other hand up and stabbed myself in the right eye with a lobster claw

Never saw her again, she was gone when I came back from the managers office after having my injury treated.

Embarrassing enough for you

[realityhack]

Ooooooh. Kebabs.

Did I mention that the other corner has a kebab shop that's still open?
It's bloody horrible though, but I'm half-cut, so my tastebuds won't let me know until the morning.

Mmmmm.

What's the safest thing to order from your average nasty kebab shop, to minimise the risk of gut rot?

[BrowneIssue]

ROTFL

Legend, pure legend.

Any more excruciating stories??

This IS anonymous, isn't it?

I bought a flat. Lived there on my own. 3 months later, met the people in the flat below. Invited myself in for drinkypoos. The lady of the flat downstairs dropped in to the conversation: "And of course, we can hear EVERYTHING from your flat."

"Everything?"

"Oh yes, what you do to yourself in bed, how long you spend on the loo, what you do in the shower. I think you need a girlfriend."

[realityhack]

I'm laughing so hard I'm crying, thanks for that.

I'm going to have to put some serious thought into embarrassing moments of my own to share. I don't remember anything just yet but it will come to me, oh yes, there are some crackers back there in my foggy memories. Mind - some are so unique I risk being identified. Hmm...

[BrowneIssue]

Once went to a posh crowded restaurant. to impress a new girl, had Lobster.

Squirted lemon in my left eye, jerked my other hand up and stabbed myself in the right eye with a lobster claw

Never saw her again...

I'm not surprised! Did it take long to learn Braille?

[BrowneIssue]

Once went to a posh crowded restaurant. to impress a new girl, had Lobster.

Squirted lemon in my left eye, jerked my other hand up and stabbed myself in the right eye with a lobster claw

Never saw her again, she was gone when I came back from the managers office after having my injury treated.

Embarrassing enough for you

My wife came in wanting to know what I was laughing at. She says:

"Poor sod".

[Diver]

I'm not surprised! Did it take long to learn Braille?

I still live in dread of ever meeting her again (and I have never spoken or told of that incident until now 30 years on)

[BrowneIssue]

Ooooooh. Kebabs.

Did I mention that the other corner has a kebab shop that's still open?
It's bloody horrible though, but I'm half-cut, so my tastebuds won't let me know until the morning.

Mmmmm.

What's the safest thing to order from your average nasty kebab shop, to minimise the risk of gut rot?

The 7-Up.