Please put more jokes here

[vetran]

Two bearded men in dresses were electrocuted when they stumbled drunkenly onto a live railway line.

I suspect they might have been trans sisters.

[vetran]

I decided to excavate the back garden to install a surprise swimming pool for my wife.

Unexpectedly, she fell into a deep depression.

[vetran]

I took up fencing.



Now, my wife claims I?m always on the defensive.

[vetran]

"Slow, slow, quick, quick, slow."

How I murdered the last 5 girlfriends who tried to make me go to ballroom dancing classes.

[NotAllThere]

Russian humour before last weekend.

The Russian Army? The second best army in Ukraine!

Russian humour since the weekend.

The Russian Army? The second best army in Russia!

[vetran]

How many incels does it take to change a lightbulb?

None. They can't find a socket to put it into in the first place.

[vetran]

Yorkshire building society admits it's closing accounts of people who are rude or discriminate.

You do realise you are based in Yorkshire, don't you??

[vetran]

'Imagine your child calling to ask you to send them some money urgently so they can get home. Only it's not really your child, it's an AI scam.'

Makes no odds to me. I'd still tell them to **** off.

[vetran]

Following her discharge from hospital, Madonna is said to be 'vomiting uncontrollably'.

In other words, working on her next album.

[vetran]

anyone seen warty?

Daily Mail: Accountant, 38, bullied at work wanted to ?go out with a bang? so stole ?170,000 from his bosses and spent it all on ONE weekend on cocaine and prostitutes. Good to see he spent the money carefully, some people would have squandered it.