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Please put more jokes here

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    If you applied for a job as a dominatrix will they thank you for your submission?
    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

    Comment


      Its only 2 more prime ministers until Christmas!
      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

      Comment


        I've decided to go somewhere quiet and not live in the fast lane.

        Anyway, the cops said I couldn't park my caravan on the motorway.
        Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

        Comment


          Charles 1 was the Caroline era. Charles 2 the Carolean era. Will Charles 3 preside over the Carolyn era (in accordance with organic chemistry principles)?

          It could even be the Sweet Carolyn era if it's especially good.
          Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

          Comment


            My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took
            it to the vets . He found that the problem was hair in the dog's
            ears. He cleaned both ears, and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then
            proceeded to tell Andrea that, if she wanted to keep this from recurring,
            she should go to the store and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in
            the dog's ears once a month.
            My wife went to the store and bought some "Nair" hair remover. At the
            register, the pharmacist told her, "If you're going to use this under your
            arms, don't use deodorant for a few days."
            My wife said, "I'm not using it under my arms."
            The pharmacist said, "If you're using it on your legs, don't use body lotion
            for a couple of days."
            My wife replied, "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must know, I'm
            using it on my Schnauzer."
            The pharmacist says, "Well, stay off your bike for about a week.
            Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

            Comment


              Never ask a dominatrix to make you a sandwich, they'll quickly make you a sub instead.
              Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

              Comment


                The late Qeen Elizabeth is en-route from Balmoral to Edinburgh, in a Mercedes hearse.

                Still can't shake the German connection.
                Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                Comment


                  Due to her death, you can no longer get a letter from the queen when you turn 100.

                  Instead, you now receive a text from prince Andrew when you turn 14.
                  Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                  Comment


                    Butler: "It's 9-11 today Sir"

                    Prince Andrew: "Fabulous. Show them in"
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment


                      Who will sell me a domain name?

                      I can.
                      Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                      Comment

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