• Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
  • Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!

Please put more jokes here

Collapse
X
  •  
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

    My New Year’s Resolution is to annoy less grammar pedants.
    …Maybe we ain’t that young anymore

    Comment


      My other new years resolution is to stop using spray deodorants…
      Roll on 2019
      …Maybe we ain’t that young anymore

      Comment


        I scared the DHL man today by showing up to the door stark naked.

        I'm not sure what scared him more; the fact that I was naked, or that I knew where he lived.

        Comment


          When the UK leaves the EU how much space will be freed up?

          1GB.....

          Comment


            A ventriloquist made a new dummy out of an old carpet. It sounded ruggish.
            The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

            Comment


              How many ears do Star Trek Vulcans have?
              Three. The right ear, the left ear, and the final front ear.
              Federico Razzoli
              Database Consultant

              Website:https://federico-razzoli.com
              Email: [email protected]

              Comment


                There are only two types of people in the world, those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.

                Comment


                  Originally posted by WTFH View Post
                  There are two types of people in this world: Those who can extrapolate from incomplete sets of data
                  Originally posted by GreenMirror View Post
                  There are only two types of people in the world, those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
                  ...and those who like repetition?
                  …Maybe we ain’t that young anymore

                  Comment


                    Breaking news...

                    A man was arrested yesterday after falling into a combine harvester whilst trying to steal it

                    He's due to be bailed tomorrow.
                    'CUK forum personality of 2011 - Winner - Yes really!!!!

                    Comment


                      Apparently pigeons die after have sex.
                      Well, the one I shagged did.
                      The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist

                      Comment

                      Working...
                      X