"And what will the lovely lady be having?" asked the waiter, whilst my girlfriend was in the toilet.
"I don't know" I replied. "A tulip, most likely”
"I don't know" I replied. "A tulip, most likely”
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“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain” -
AVOID dull chats with hairdressers by having the location, date and length of your holiday tattooed on the back of your neck.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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I've been trying to teach my mate how to play golf recently but the problem seems to be his drive.
His wife stands on it and doesn't let us out.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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American teachers will now be armed with 9mm Glocks. Librarians will be issued silencers.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Have you been hit with a rhythm stick?
If so, you may be entitled to personal Ian Dury claim…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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It appears we're having a bad spell of wether.…Maybe we ain’t that young anymoreComment
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Apparently Charles Dickens' 'Tale of Two Cities' was serialised in two local newspapers.
It was the Bicester Times. It was the Worcester Times.Comment
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Was that really your 25,000th post?Originally posted by mudskipper View Post
Could have been worse i suppose.Comment
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25000 posts? Gordon Bennet! My count is less than half that and I've been on CUK since, er, about 1932.bloggoth
If everything isn't black and white, I say, 'Why the hell not?'
John Wayne (My guru, not to be confused with my beloved prophet Jeremy Clarkson)Comment
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