Could someone please call me a lazy fat waster?

[Jeff Maginty]

..

[Mich the Tester]

Get your fat arse in gear you lazy git.

[mudskipper]

Over the last few months (ok I admit it: most of this year) I've just generally been very restless, lazy, using booze as a crutch, worried about the future and generally wasting my time (outside of work).

I think all the doom and gloom in the economy (increasing cost of living, poor returns on savings & investments, everything slanted in favour of the already-rich) has weighed heavily on me.

I really need to get off my arse and do some regular exercise and do something more productive/worthwhile in my leisure time and stop worrying about how I'm going to get by in the future.

Maybe it will help to motivate me if you reply with a suitable insult or command to get my finger out.

Cheers,
Jeff

FFS, what a bedwetter.

Set yourself a goal to get motivated. London -> Brighton worked for Suity - made a man out of him!

[Jeff Maginty]

..

[Hawk]

Is this a thread set up to insult a forum member?

[SimonMac]

Over the last few months (ok I admit it: most of this year) I've just generally been very restless, lazy, using booze as a crutch, worried about the future and generally wasting my time (outside of work).

I think all the doom and gloom in the economy (increasing cost of living, poor returns on savings & investments, everything slanted in favour of the already-rich) has weighed heavily on me.

I really need to get off my arse and do some regular exercise and do something more productive/worthwhile in my leisure time and stop worrying about how I'm going to get by in the future.

Maybe it will help to motivate me if you reply with a suitable insult or command to get my finger out.

Cheers,
Jeff

Ok, you are MF and I claim my £5

[Pondlife]

FFS, what a bedwetter.

Set yourself a goal to get motivated. London -> Brighton worked for Suity - made a man out of him!

So you're saying it was a trip to Brighton that made a man out of Suity?

[mudskipper]

So you're saying it was a trip to Brighton that made a man out of Suity?

Indeed. But he had a very sore arse afterwards.

[suityou01]

So you're saying it was a trip to Brighton that made a man out of Suity?

You get to the top of ditchling beacon and you can smell the whiff of the KY from there

[DaveB]

<whiny bollocks>

Cheers,
Jeff

Get of your arse you useles sack of tulip. You are nothing but an oxygen thief and to quote the song "a tragic waste of skin". Seriously, there are vagrant crack addicts who are worth more to society than you are, you pustulent, scrofulous turd.

In fact you are such a waste of a perfectly good existence that I can't even be bothered to be creative about it anymore and so am resorting to cutting and pasting generic usenet flames. Frankly even this is pushing it in terms of effort that you deserve to have expended on you.

You're a putrescent mass, a walking vomit. You are a spineless little worm deserving nothing but the profoundest contempt. You are a jerk, a cad, a weasel. Your life is a monument to stupidity. You are a stench, a revulsion, a putrefaction, a big suck on a sour lemon with a lime twist.

You are a bleating foal, a curdled staggering mutant dwarf smeared richly with the effluvia and offal accompanying your alleged birth into this world.

An insensate, blinking calf, meaningful to nobody, abandoned by the puke-drooling, giggling beasts who sired you and then killed themselves in regret for what they had done.

I will never get over the embarrassment of belonging to the same species as you. You are a monster, an ogre, a malformation. I retch at the very thought of you. You have all the appeal of a paper cut. Lepers avoid you.

You are vile, worthless, less than nothing. You are a weed, a fungus, a ferment, the dregs of this earth. And did I mention you smell?

If you aren't an idiot, you made a world-class effort at simulating one. Try to edit your writing of unnecessary material before attempting to impress us with your insight. The evidence that you are an idiot will still be available to readers, but they will be able to access it more rapidly.

You snail-skulled little twit. Would that a hawk pick you up, drive its beak into your brain, and upon finding it rancid set you loose to fly briefly before spattering the ocean rocks with the frothy pink shame of your ignoble blood. May you choke on the queasy, convulsing nausea of your own trite, foolish beliefs

You are weary, stale, flat and unprofitable. You are grimy, squalid, nasty and profane. You are foul and disgusting.

You're a fool, an ignoramus. Monkeys look down on you. Even sheep won't have sex with you. Your hand even refuses autoerotism. You are unreservedly pathetic, starved for
attention, and lost in a land that reality forgot.

And what meaning do you expect your delusional self-important statements of unknowing, inexperienced opinion to have at here? What fantasy do you hold that you would believe that your tiny-fisted tantrums would have more weight than that of a leprous desert rat, spinning rabidly in a circle, waiting for the bite of the snake?

You are a waste of flesh. You have no rhythm. You are ridiculous and obnoxious. You are the moral equivalent of a leech. You are a living emptiness, a meaningless void. You are sour and senile. You are a disease, you puerile one-handed slack-jawed drooling meat slapper.

On a good day you're a half-wit. You remind me of drool. You are deficient in all that lends character. You have the personality of wallpaper.

You are dank and filthy. You are asinine and benighted. You are the source of all unpleasantness. You spread misery and sorrow wherever you go.

I cannot believe how incredibly stupid you are. I mean rock-hard stupid. Dehydrated-rock-hard stupid. Stupid so stupid that it goes way beyond the stupid we know into a whole different dimension of stupid. You are trans-stupid stupid. Meta-stupid. Stupid collapsed on itself so far that even the neutrons have collapsed. Stupid gotten so dense that no intellect can escape. Singularity stupid. Blazing hot mid-day sun on the warm side of Mercury stupid. You emit more stupid in one second than our entire galaxy emits in a year. Quasar stupid.

Perhaps this is some primordial fragment from the original big bang of stupid. Some pure essence of a stupid so uncontaminated by anything else as to be beyond the laws of physics that we know. I'm sorry. I can't go on. This is an epiphany of stupid for me. After this, you may not hear from me again for a while. I don't have enough strength left to deride your ignorant questions and half baked comments about unimportant trivia, or any of the rest of your drivel.

The only thing worse than your logic is your manners. I have
snipped away most of what you wrote, because, well... it didn't really say anything.

Your attempt at constructing a creative post was pitiful. I mean, really, stringing together a bunch of incoherent pointless whining was hardly effective... Maybe later in life, after you have learned to read, write, spell, count, and learn to type you will have more success. True, these are
rudimentary skills that many of us "normal" people take for granted that everyone has an easy time of mastering. But we sometimes forget that there are "challenged" persons in this world who find these things more difficult. If I had known,
that this was your case then I would have never read your post. It just wouldn't have been "right." Sort of like parking in a handicapped space.

I wish you the best of luck in the emotional, and social struggles that seem to be placing such a demand on you (like passing gas, for instance).

In short, if I traded tulip and got you I would be the loser on the deal. Otherwise, have a good day and keep enjoying your pitiful existence.

P.S.