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Good news and bad news

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    #1

    Good news and bad news

    The bad news is that your bike has been nicked and your husband has been killed. The good news is that we have found the bike, your husband is alive and well and the thief is dead.

    Police Wrongly Tell Woman Her Husband Died in Motorcycle Collision after a thief who stole bike is killed | Mail Online
    Tags: None
    #2
    Seems like a good result all round.
    Down with racism. Long live miscegenation!

    Comment

      #3
      Doctor to new father "I have good news and bad news, which would you like first?"
      New father "The bad news first please"
      Doctor "Your new son is a Ginger"
      Father "and the good news?"
      Doctor "Your new son is stillborn"


      to cruel?
      "Condoms should come with a free pack of earplugs."

      Comment

        #4
        Doctor to new father "I have good news and bad news, which would you like first?"
        New father "The bad news first please"
        Doctor "You have 4 weeks to live"
        Father "and the good news?"
        Doctor "I just bought a new Ferrari"

        Comment

          #5
          I'd be happy to console her if she's still upset!
          I didn't say it was your ******* fault, I said I was blaming you!

          Comment

            #6
            I have some consoling to offer to the female Police officer too....

            Comment

              #7
              Doctor to patient "I have bad news and good news, which would you like first?"
              patient "The bad news first please"
              Doctor "we have had to amputate both your legs"
              patient "and the good news?"
              Doctor "the fella in the next bed wants to buy your slippers"

              Comment

                #8
                Originally posted by ThomasSoerensen View Post
                Doctor to new father "I have good news and bad news, which would you like first?"
                New father "The bad news first please"
                Doctor "Your new son is a Ginger"
                Father "and the good news?"
                Doctor "Your new son is stillborn"


                to cruel?
                Yes, too cruel.

                Mind you, as I was in a better viewing position than my wife during the birth of our youngest, I did say "Oooh he looks a bit ginger" as his head was crowning.

                I got some funny looks from the midwife.

                Comment

                  #9
                  Originally posted by ThomasSoerensen View Post
                  Doctor to new father "I have good news and bad news, which would you like first?"
                  New father "The bad news first please"
                  Doctor "Your new son is a Ginger"
                  Father "and the good news?"
                  Doctor "Your new son is stillborn"


                  to cruel?
                  Prick

                  I bet I'm better looking than you.
                  Science isn't about why, it's about why not. You ask: why is so much of our science dangerous? I say: why not marry safe science if you love it so much. In fact, why not invent a special safety door that won't hit you in the butt on the way out, because you are fired. - Cave Johnson

                  Comment

                    #10
                    So everything was alright in the end. And I mean EVERYTHING.
                    - Richard, Wimborne, UK, 8/6/2012 10:10
                    nice
                    Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.

                    Comment

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