I bumped into an ex-girlfriend today....

[DimPrawn]

You are so lucky not to have good looks or personality.

That's what my mum used to say to me.

[TimberWolf]

You said what everyone says when they bump into each other.

"sorry", "thank you", "ouf" or something unintelligible.

[vetran]

...guess what one of her first questions was?

Did you know - you being so bad in bed you turned me gay?

How are you since the prolapse?

Where's my f'n maintenance? I need to pay Prawn minor's bail.

Did you know your Dad , Brother & your dog Winkie are better in the sack than you?

[BrilloPad]

...guess what one of her first questions was?

You live in Swindon? You are such a failure. I am just here on a day trip to see how the proles live.

[ChrisPackit]

Was it "Don't you understand the conditions of your restraining order?"

[sasguru]

Anyway.

One of the first questions she asked is (whilst pulling her top to reveal even more cleavage)


"So....what car you driving these days?"


Take note you sad Honda and Skoda drivers.

So you went out with chav birds, eh? Not a surprise.

[DimPrawn]

So you went out with chav birds, eh? Not a surprise.

She was the best looker on the whole council estate.

[BrilloPad]

She was the best looker on the whole council estate.

And did she put out? Not with you obviously - I meant with all the others.