Bankruptcy

[Cliphead]

You value career over partner?

Always. You might only have one career...

[Spacecadet]

Always. You might only have one career...

I'm sure there was something in the news a few years back about some survey which proved that people are more likely to get divorced than change bank.

[Cliphead]

I'm sure there was something in the news a few years back about some survey which proved that people are more likely to get divorced than change bank.

If a partner can't or won't be supportive of your choice of career and all that entails what chance have both career and relationship got?

[configman]

I've been busy the last couple of days and missed this thread.

I was pushed into voluntary liquidation about 20 years ago by HMRC. I was a builder caught in the recession of '91 and my main customers went bust but HMRC still claimed tax on money not received - thats how it was then.

Taking into account the house going into negative equity by £30,000 and HMRC's bill for approx £50,000 it was obvious it would take years to pay off and prevent me recoverring for a long long time. I went bankrupt and started again in IT. I am now actually better off because HMRC were being nasty bar stewards. In those twenty years the only debt I ever had was a mortgage - I have never found the need for a credit card. Being a bankrupt trained me out of the need for credit - ever since I have survived with full payments even for cars.

Twenty years later during another recession I have no debt whatsoever, I own a nice home in the Home Counties and one in Southern China by the sea. 15 years to go before I retire and I am already looking forward to an income of £18,000 per annum + inflation and no debts. I now look at the nasty bar stewards in HMRC and laugh at the mess they are in with all that debt they have to pay off and their pension rights decreasing - it is what they tried to do to me but I now laugh last and loudest especially as I emigrate very shortly.

When you look into bankruptcy decide if what you owe now will prevent you having a future, and if you do go bankrupt what are you going to do to make that future.

Bankruptcy can if managed correctly be a really positive step - only the OP will know which way to go.

[Cliphead]

Twenty years later during another recession I have no debt whatsoever, I own a nice home in the Home Counties and one in Southern China by the sea. 15 years to go before I retire and I am already looking forward to an income of £18,000 per annum + inflation and no debts. I now look at the nasty bar stewards in HMRC and laugh at the mess they are in with all that debt they have to pay off and their pension rights decreasing - it is what they tried to do to me but I now laugh last and loudest especially as I emigrate very shortly.

[NotReallyButSeriously]

"Eating Haggis" should go in UD if it isn't already.

Eating Haggis should go on your CV

[Sysman]

If a partner can't or won't be supportive of your choice of career and all that entails what chance have both career and relationship got?

Minimum on both counts.

[vetran]

AIUI the OP doesn't want to leave the other half, he has a kid he loves and is actually quite fond of his partner. Otherwise it would have ended in arguments more frequently, rather than her just changing the subject.

His problem is that they are spending more than they are earning.

Issues:
second home in Germany.
Travel costs
No luck finding work in UK (or am I detecting no interest?)
Belief his niche skill set won't allow him to earn enough closer to home.

No real assets due to negative equity and lack of focus on saving.

home above their means in London.
His partner has her head in the sand about their situation.

The grouping of the above is intentional.

Possible solutions
Make the situation the families problem by finding a way of explaining the issue to your partner.

Work through your issues steering her they way you need to go.

set the scene , shut up & listen then steer/explain
I have to repeat that regularly in my head.

You don't make any decisions, she does! You just agree with them. That's not being a wimp its getting her to invest in the process. And covering your butt once its all back to normal. You haven't given her 5 years of living on baked beans because you are mean, she knows that she dragged you all out of a financial mess by massive personal sacrifice, isn't she great. You know the truth!

Will your partner consider home working? Child minding will produce £10-20k a year and no child care costs, friends for your son. Plus it will bring her in touch with people who work for a living and are probably doing so because their other half don't earn a lot of money.

Reality check - £300 a day, £1500 a week, £6000 a month with commuting and work accommodation costs taken out of pre tax income is a lot of money. Many families live on a third of that so you must be able to cut costs.
In addition you have two flats as a pension pot.

Team Vetran live very comfortably on an awful lot less than that, whilst I'm not retiring in 5 years we do have a decent warchest now.

[vetran]

Cheers for the positive reps Guys - just noticed them

[DimPrawn]

This is what happens to you if you go bankrupt.

The new £5m Bovey Towers: 'Anthea paid' says newly-discharged bankrupt Grant, who still owes £3m | Mail Online

You have been warned.