My Preferred form of Torture

[MaryPoppins]

Who's wearing the gimp suit this week?

MF?

[MarillionFan]

MF?

Yeah sorry about that. I put it on a hot wash and it's shrunk.

Maybe DS1 could put it on an action man! :-)

[NotAllThere]

...I think my preferred torture method would be to take them to a deserted warehouse, and nail them to the upstairs floor using 10 inch railway spikes. Then walk away and leave them.

You're obviously a namby-pampy bleeding heart wishy washy liberal.

I'd nail them to the ceiling.

[PAH]

I'd saved the nails and use a meat grinder, as implemented in this instructional video circa 1980:

The Exterminator

I think that's what they call pet mince.

[DaveB]

You're obviously a namby-pampy bleeding heart wishy washy liberal.

I'd nail them to the ceiling.

All very well in theory but in practice it's just not practical.

For a start you've got to get them up and hold them there while you nail them in place. This either requires an accomplice, which is undesirable, or suitable equipment, which is impractical.

Even if you do manage to get them suitably attached there are going to be problems. For starters the nails are probably just going to pull straight through under the weight of the subject leaving you with a body on the floor and nails in the ceiling.

Assuming you do manage to get them to stay up, if you nail them up facing the ceiling it makes further acts of violence problematic as you are largely restricted to the back in terms of what you can work on and they sag awkwardly as well. A blood eagle is not really going to work in these circumstances. If you nail them up face down, so to speak, you run the risk of suffocation before you can inflict any more damage yourself. The weight of the torso on the arms pulls against the chest muscles making it extremely difficult for your guest to breath in much the same way as cruicifiction. This is fine of course if this is the intended result and you simply want them up there for effect when found.

If nailing really is your thing then an inclined surface is best. It allows easy access for further work and shows off the results to full effect.

[norrahe]

All very well in theory but in practice it's just not practical.

For a start you've got to get them up and hold them there while you nail them in place. This either requires an accomplice, which is undesirable, or suitable equipment, which is impractical.

Even if you do manage to get them suitably attached there are going to be problems. For starters the nails are probably just going to pull straight through under the weight of the subject leaving you with a body on the floor and nails in the ceiling.

Assuming you do manage to get them to stay up, if you nail them up facing the ceiling it makes further acts of violence problematic as you are largely restricted to the back in terms of what you can work on and they sag awkwardly as well. A blood eagle is not really going to work in these circumstances. If you nail them up face down, so to speak, you run the risk of suffocation before you can inflict any more damage yourself. The weight of the torso on the arms pulls against the chest muscles making it extremely difficult for your guest to breath in much the same way as cruicifiction. This is fine of course if this is the intended result and you simply want them up there for effect when found.

If nailing really is your thing then an inclined surface is best. It allows easy access for further work and shows off the results to full effect.

you have waaaaay too much time on your hands Mr B, either that or you've been benched too long

[DaveB]

you have waaaaay too much time on your hands Mr B, either that or you've been benched too long

Just offering some pointers for the enthusiastic amateur

[MaryPoppins]

Just offering some pointers for the enthusiastic amateur

I've taken notes Dave, and will PM you for further details.