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Posters who've had loony partners

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    #91
    Originally posted by Mich the Tester View Post
    Any more?


    Actually, I think it's been my ex-partners that said it more offten.
    How did this happen? Who's to blame? Well certainly there are those more responsible than others, and they will be held accountable, but again truth be told, if you're looking for the guilty, you need only look into a mirror.

    Follow me on Twitter - LinkedIn Profile - The HAB blog - New Blog: Mad Cameron
    Xeno points: +5 - Asperger rating: 36 - Paranoid Schizophrenic rating: 44%

    "We hang the petty thieves and appoint the great ones to high office" - Aesop

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      #92
      Originally posted by hyperD View Post
      One of my casual flings way back liked to play the game of the glass-bottom boat. Imagine my surprise when inadvertantly acting the role of passenger I was underneath the glass coffee table looking for a magazine when she suddenly leaped on top of the table and sat on her haunches and carried out the act.

      Well I say surprised, that was before I realised there wasn't any glass.
      Originally posted by d000hg View Post
      Go on, save us all having to look it up. Also, did she know the glass was missing?
      Originally posted by MaryPoppins View Post
      I think HD would have been a bit squished if there was no glass. Also, in need of an urgent shower.
      I don't think I mis-read...? Still waiting for a definition.


      As far as Lager and Black... it's a recognised drink but a little girly. However Guiness & Black is also drunk. And Snakebite & Black also.
      Originally posted by MaryPoppins
      I'd still not breastfeed a nazi
      Originally posted by vetran
      Urine is quite nourishing

      Comment


        #93
        Once went out with a women who told me she was the reincarnation of Princess Diana!

        The fact she was 35 at the time was lost on her!!!!

        Lasted about 4 weeks.
        What happens in General, stays in General.
        You know what they say about assumptions!

        Comment


          #94
          Originally posted by MarillionFan View Post
          Once went out with a women who told me she was the reincarnation of Princess Diana!

          The fact she was 35 at the time was lost on her!!!!

          Lasted about 4 weeks.
          Hey MF!

          My fanbase just increased 100%

          Me, me, me...

          Comment


            #95
            Originally posted by d000hg View Post
            I don't think I mis-read...? Still waiting for a definition.
            I was referring to the fact that if HD had a lady (?) crouching on him doing a poop, he might feel a bit squashed, and might need a shower.
            Practically perfect in every way....there's a time and (more importantly) a place for malarkey.
            +5 Xeno Cool Points

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              #96
              I so regret consulting the Urban Dictionary
              +50 Xeno Geek Points
              Come back Toolpusher, scotspine, Voodooflux. Pogle
              As for the rest of you - DILLIGAF

              Purveyor of fine quality smut since 2005

              CUK Olympic University Challenge Champions 2010/2012

              Comment


                #97
                Originally posted by hyperD View Post
                One of my casual flings way back liked to play the game of the glass-bottom boat. Imagine my surprise when inadvertantly acting the role of passenger I was underneath the glass coffee table looking for a magazine when she suddenly leaped on top of the table and sat on her haunches and carried out the act.

                Well I say surprised, that was before I realised there wasn't any glass.
                WTF?

                Originally posted by cojak View Post
                The best I can manage is that I went out with a nice bloke, but still lived with his mum, wore cowboy boots and ordered lager and blackcurrent at the bar.

                I just couldn't get that enthusiastic and so fibbed on the 2nd date that an ex had asked me back. I didn't have the heart to say that I didn't fancy him.
                For himself? Wierdo!!

                Originally posted by MaryPoppins View Post
                I was referring to the fact that if HD had a lady (?) crouching on him doing a poop, he might feel a bit squashed, and might need a shower.
                Poop - oh gross.... I was thinking maybe wee but poop
                Bazza gets caught
                Socrates - "The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."

                CUK University Challenge Champions 2010

                Comment


                  #98
                  This is THE FUNNIEST THREAD EVER!!!!!
                  Bazza gets caught
                  Socrates - "The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing."

                  CUK University Challenge Champions 2010

                  Comment


                    #99
                    Originally posted by MaryPoppins View Post
                    I was referring to the fact that if HD had a lady (?) crouching on him doing a poop, he might feel a bit squashed, and might need a shower.
                    I thought maybe that was the point of the story. So the glass boat thing, is that taking a dump on a glass table while someone lies underneath?
                    Originally posted by MaryPoppins
                    I'd still not breastfeed a nazi
                    Originally posted by vetran
                    Urine is quite nourishing

                    Comment


                      Quite frightening...

                      I used to live alone in an old farmhouse in Staffordshire.

                      Around midnight I was coming home from my lodge, talking to 'her' on the phone, she lived in Notts...

                      Chatting etc etc... said goodnight etc - I got out of the car walked to the front door - she comes rushing out from behind a hedge and jumps me 'for a laugh'.

                      Or the time I was sitting in my lounge watching TV - raining and thundering outside, curtains open - it had just got dark. A bolt of lightening, she was standing outside the window looking in at me, lit up by the lightening - p1ssing down. I tried not to look shocked - I got up closed the curtains and sat down again. She knocked a couple of minutes later - she did it 'for a laugh'.

                      Then the physical violence started - that's when I left.

                      She was a nurse...

                      Total freakshow!


                      T

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