Originally posted by MaryPoppins
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Bernard Matthews dies
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Bernie Winters. Ha! Poor old Schnorbitz died of a rectal prolapse on stage - what a way to go. I'm sure I read something in FHM years ago about it happening at a school, and the kids being sprayed with fecal matter and dogs innards. Not sure that's true, but it still makes me laugh today.Originally posted by MaryPoppins View PostHe's been dead awhile I'm sure. Is he the one who had the dog, Schnorbitz, the dog who had the rectal prolapse during a perfomance in a school? I'm giggling as I'm typing this, because I seriously doubt Bernard Manning did a performance in a school.Practically perfect in every way....there's a time and (more importantly) a place for malarkey.
+5 Xeno Cool PointsComment
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Bernie Winters - Cribbins was diggin a hole and the womblesOriginally posted by jmo21 View PostBernard Cribbins?Rule Number 1 - Assuming that you have a valid contract in place always try to get your poo onto your timesheet, provided that the timesheet is valid for your current contract and covers the period of time that you are billing for.
I preferred version 1!Comment
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And Jackanory, he was pretty damn good at that too.Originally posted by TonyEnglish View PostBernie Winters - Cribbins was diggin a hole and the womblesComment
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Just in time for Christmas.Originally posted by TonyEnglish View PostI make it
Turkeys 1 Matthews MillionsBehold the warranty -- the bold print giveth and the fine print taketh away.Comment
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I believe his Funeral will come with all the trimmings!
“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
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Originally posted by shaunbhoy View PostI believe his Funeral will come with all the trimmings!

If you think my attitude stinks, you should smell my fingers.Comment
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I took a job at the turkey farm many years ago.
The farmer says "I need you wank the male turkeys to extract semen for breeding, wear these bright green gloves".
reluctantly I said I'd give it a go.
So off I went, nervously opened the shed door and.
Gobble gobble gobble they all cried.

There are limits!Comment
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