Project manager going down in flames

[Cliphead]

FFS what a bunch of wimps. A one to one in a quiet corner usually sorts out the bullies.

[RichardCranium]

I think the ordeal you mention is so horrific that I cannot compare

Really? I thought it was the sort of crap you were putting up with. Or may be within a few months as your responsibilities and profile spread.

although knowing someone else has suffered more than me is no comfort whatsoever.

Sorry, I was trying to empathise. What I was alluding to was that it is not your fault and that there are really tulipty environments out there. Those of us who work by collaboration, team-building and co-operation just get walked over in the alpha-male environments.

I hope life is treating you better now, and things are picking up for you now.

That was a gig I did in the mid 1990s. It is the worst I've had.

It was worse than BT; at BT a bloke grabbed me by the jacket and started dragging me toward the door so he could beat me up outside. Why? Because I worked in IT and his manager put more pressure on him to perform than the available technology could achieve.

It was worse than the software house where I was ordered to sit in silence for a month with nothing to do. (On day 28 I walked.)

Anyway, the point I was trying to make was that if you cannot find a way to attend without your blood pressure rising / getting a tense diaphragm / drinking / losing sleep, then it is not the environment for you. That does not make you bad or weak, just suited to a different kind of environment. For example, I can handle the work-shy public sector layabouts with endless patience and ultimately win the battles of process and skiving and make them do what they are paid to do. I'd defy an alpha-male to do that year in and year out and not go mad.

[Zippy]

Good post RC. I can't imagine what that environment was like - certainly nothing I've had to experience. And I'm an olympic level whinger.

SY01 - if your PM is a knob, then he's toast. Not your fault, not your problem. Keep doing a good job and don't agonise over it. I have to say that your post suggests you feel the need to constantly justify yourself (despite doing a good job). Please don't fall in to that trap! The worst case scenario is you'll have to move on. It ain't that bad - really.

[NickFitz]

What they all said with such eloquence

Oh, and if that worthless furball is going down, don't let him bring you down with him. Even if you get canned, just remember: don't let him bring you down. You can be out of work yet still feel good about yourself and your life. He can't.

He will feel as if his world has caved in when he gets canned tomorrow. He sucks and will break; you don't and won't.

It's one of the things about being a contractor: if something comes to an end, it's just par for the course. For a permy, it's like having their head amputated.

I know that life on the bench isn't easy, but it's still better than thinking your life is over because a business that never gave a rat's ass about you in the first place has dumped you.

You'll be OK. You can rack up loads of posts in Now drinking if the worst comes to the worst

[scotspine]

wow...this thread is quite an eye opener! i'm deliriously happy to say that i've never had to work in such an environment and i must take my hat off to the self-restraint that has been referred to here. i would never have been able to hold myself back! you can congratulate yourself on your considered responses and as others have posted, continue to do yourself the favour of maintaining a professional approach. don't think toooo much like a permie. you're a contractor(?). strictly speaking, you should be able to up sticks and take your leave of the place rather than have to suffer that pile of manure. however, easier said than done i know, so keep your cool and wait to see how it pans out. sometimes decisions are made for you in these circumstances.

[AlfredJPruffock]

I was speechless after reading this account

There was a continuous threat of physical violence. Being shoved, grabbed and pulled, poked or occasionally slapped was not uncommon. Senior management were perfectly happy with that. To have a manage scream in your face that he'd drag you outside and give you a kicking for showing him up was a regular feature.

This was not a job but systematic torture and degrdation of the human spirit at evey level - the end result was ill health and suffering for you and I am profoundly sorry to learn of this abuse as you strike me as being a very decent human being.

I cannot say that for the managment you have described,

Disgusting.

[jmo21]

I was speechless after reading this account

There was a continuous threat of physical violence. Being shoved, grabbed and pulled, poked or occasionally slapped was not uncommon. Senior management were perfectly happy with that. To have a manage scream in your face that he'd drag you outside and give you a kicking for showing him up was a regular feature.

This was not a job but systematic torture and degrdation of the human spirit at evey level - the end result was ill health and suffering for you and I am profoundly sorry to learn of this abuse as you strike me as being a very decent human being.

I cannot say that for the managment you have described,

Disgusting.

If someone slapped me at work, I'd be leaving shortly after being fired for leathering them.

Thankfully never been anywhere with anything like that.

Did 6 month in an asset management place about a year and a half ago, and it was nothing like that.

All this is another very good reason to build up that war chest so that you can quit these types of places as early as possible.

[rhubarb]

Perhaps you should consider changing your sig. You certainly don't seem to live by it.

[dang65]

The really scary thing is that those people presumably leave the office from time to time and actually enter the real world, perhaps at the wheel of a car even.

I've worked in a couple of places with intimidating colleagues/managers, as everyone has surely, but they were occasional individuals, not the norm. With individuals it's usually just a case of standing up and facing them down and they f*** off somewhere else, or even become quite friendly towards you.

But a whole organisation with that attitude... not for me thanks. I'd be straight out the door.

[d000hg]

The really scary thing is that those people presumably leave the office from time to time and actually enter the real world, perhaps at the wheel of a car even.

These would be the infamous Audi/BMW-driving 'cocks' they talk about on Top Gear.