Divorce while a contractor?

[BrilloPad]

We use to attend church every weekend, the wife has only been coming periodically over the last few weeks. I have been taking the children every weekend without fail.

My main concern is to give the children stability.

How do you give the children stability by moving out?

[suityou01]

Someone is pulling her strings. Possibly this nob via text message. Relate is a good idea. Her head is not right, and neither is yours. If you can get help, do so. She should not be jeopardising her marriage in this way, by listening to some creep. She needs to put the kids first.

I would suggest there is more than two of you in this marriage, find out who and try and get them to stop meddling, or get her to stop listening to them.

Lay off the booze.

[TykeMerc]

How do you give the children stability by moving out?

Indeed.

Speaking from experience stability for the children is the first thing to go out of the window (at near light speed) when a parent moves out.
The kids can cope with or ignore parental rows in the family home, but one moving out provides a lot of scope for them to feel neglected, unloved or just get undilluted twisted statements from the remaining parent.

[Platypus]

The kids can cope with or ignore parental rows in the family home, but one moving out provides a lot of scope for them to feel neglected, unloved or just get undilluted twisted statements from the remaining parent.

Spot on - well said.

[TykeMerc]

Spot on - well said.

Like many posters on this board, been there, got that particular tee shirt unfortunately.

I wish I couldn't speak from personal experience on this subject, but I had three children when my marriage imploded in not entirely different circumstances from what Pleomax has said.

[EternalOptimist]

F* ck the CSA

[BrilloPad]

F* ck the CSA

I think they tend to do the f**king.

[FSM with Cheddar]

I also agree with BrilloPad.

One of the good things about going to church is that you have a great community around you to support you both.

Ask someone that you both trust (and is willing) to act as a mediator and help guide you both.

The problem with using relate is that there is a 6month + queue.

Sounds like you have both made a few cries for help, which hopefully means you are keen to resolve the problems. Although she may have said some horrible things, that doesn't mean she really thinks them. It was just a way of hurting you at that point.

Hope things work out.

[pleomax]

How do you give the children stability by moving out?

My parents were called to collect me in my broken down state.

I have been back since and apologised and expressed a wish to return to fatherly duties at the marital home but she said no.

I can not find any legal thing here, she said if i did that she would move out and take the children with her.

I can not believe she is using the children as pawns in this!

[pleomax]

I do thank you all for your comments, I have taken them on board.

It is nice to know that for all the micky taking that happens on here that you are willing to listen when the tulip hits the fan and offer sensible advice.

only another 3 hours before i leave client site to go visit "Our Home".