Small children in the office

[DaveB]

There was some brat howling on the train home the other evening.

I was not best pleased...

Though it did come out with the immortal line "Dad, are we there yet, Dad... Dad.... Are we there yet?"

Story told by Dylan Moran. Mum and kid on the train.

Kid : "Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum...."
Mum : "What is it?"
Kid : "That man has a hat!"
Mum : "Yes he does doesnt he"
Kid : "Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum...."
Mum : "What?"
Kid : "I dont have a hat."
Mum : "No you don't do you."
Kid : "Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum,Mum, Mum, Mum...."
Mum :"WHAT!?"
Kid : "Can I have a hat."
Mum : "Not right now, we are on the train."
Kid : "Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum, Mum...."

Mum : "And to think, the first time you said that it made me so happy...."

[MaryPoppins]

Someone’s brought a small child to the office. The child has been screaming and wailing all morning. That’s quite logical; children don’t like offices. Offices are boring, stuffy, grey places full of bored miserable adults watching their lives slip away from them. Small children like playgrounds with colourful swings, footballs and climbing frames. What I don’t understand is what would lead anyone to bring a small child to the office. Before you ask; no the child isn’t ill, the woman just thought it would be fun to show off her young child to her colleagues. What a bloody racket.

Argh. Top of my (long) office pet hates list.

[GeorgeGregan]

There was a bring your kid to work day a few years back at client site. One conscientious developer type's kids were the model of well behaved, hardly made a sound and spent the day quietly colouring in, web surfing and being introduced to their dad's mates.

The senior manager type's kid was somewhat different, went absolutely berserk, running around the office constantly demanding attention and destroying everything in sight. Was a little disturbing how closely they matched their parent's personalities.

[TimberWolf]

Someone’s brought a small child to the office. The child has been screaming and wailing all morning. That’s quite logical; children don’t like offices. Offices are boring, stuffy, grey places full of bored miserable adults watching their lives slip away from them. Small children like playgrounds with colourful swings, footballs and climbing frames. What I don’t understand is what would lead anyone to bring a small child to the office. Before you ask; no the child isn’t ill, the woman just thought it would be fun to show off her young child to her colleagues. What a bloody racket.

You should have shown them where the coffee vending machine is located. And the button for extra sugar. They would probably have settled down nicely after a few cupfuls