I am socially inept...

[RichardCranium]

Ah crap. The wedding list is empty.

Strippergram.

[BrilloPad]

Strippergram.

Are you offering? How much do you charge?

[RichardCranium]

Are you offering? How much?

To drop my rags at a big social gathering like a wedding breakfast?

I won't pay more than £20.

[BrilloPad]

To drop my rags at a big social gathering like a wedding breakfast?

I won't pay more than £20.

Start waxing your legs now - or do you shave?

BP
BTW - when are you posting in tpd again?

[RichardCranium]

Start waxing your legs now - or do you shave?

Neither, of course. That would spoil the effect (and not keep me warm when sleeping in hedgerows).

BTW - when are you posting in tpd again?

As from about an hour ago.

[Gonzo]

Fancy wanting to go to a wedding!!! I do my very best to get out of them even when it is close family.

Going to friends' weddings is great. It is when you start having to go to friends' funerals you start feeling like an old git.

[mailric]

take an empty box and stick on the presents table. ifyou get there late enough they'll never remember which pressie you took.

[RichardCranium]

they'll never remember which pressie you took.

You're supposed to leave them, not take them!

[d000hg]

If you have to just put the present on a table, buy anything, the important part is to be seen carrying a gift when you turn up! A picture frame or book of love poetry would both be fine, as would a bottle of champagne in by book.

[mailric]

You're supposed to leave them, not take them!

so thats why i've not many invites this year...