Anyone here mudered anyone?

[The Master]

How are the cunning plans coming along?

I'm thinking of getting a new minion. Zeitghost is enjoying it in the agony booth too much.

But wait, I've said too much...

[wendigo100]

Mum's the word.

By the way, about that army of Burmese monks he recruited ...

[FarmerPalmer]

Coincidentally ... a farmer who drinks at my local killed his wife about seven years ago for having an affair and taunting him about it.

The judge and jury obviously decided she had it coming so he was only sentenced to a few years and he's been out for two or three.

Anybody else know any murdering farmers?

None of the farmers that I know have guns - which is why I know them.
It means I get to use mine on their land.

for a bit of deerstalking, take down problem foxes, control rabbits, pigeons, magpies etc

[EternalOptimist]

He served 99.6% of his time & topped himself inside 3 weeks before he was due for release.

Its funny, we dont have hanging in this country, we just get the gits to hang themselves

[Sysman]

One of my colleagues used to have a boss who got a hitman to kill his wife, and make it look like a burglary gone wrong.

She lived to tell the tale, and in the resulting investigation the police found that his previous wife had died the same way, with him collecting a huge wad of insurance money. That case was reopened, and the cops did him for that too.

[zeitghost]

Its funny, we dont have hanging in this country, we just get the gits to hang themselves

It's not funny that instead of paying for 6 feet of rope, we paid to keep the scrote in a cell for 10 years...

[IR35 Avoider]

It wasn't his fault the bloke had a brittle bone condition though. He probably would have been let off with a warning if the guy only had a few cuts and bruises.

Not that I go around punching people in the face. But in light of recent events I might consider it

Apparently there is a legal principle that "you take your victim as you find him" which means that someone-else's brittle bones become the puncher's problem, in this scenario.

[IR35 Avoider]

It's not funny that instead of paying for 6 feet of rope, we paid to keep the scrote in a cell for 10 years...

In the USA one of the arguments against the death penalty is that life imprisonment is actually cheaper, once you take into account the cost of appeals against death sentences and the cost of time spent on death-row. (I'm not saying that would be the case here if we had the death penalty, it's just an interesting fact...)

[Churchill]

Coincidentally ... a farmer who drinks at my local killed his wife about seven years ago for having an affair and taunting him about it.

The judge and jury obviously decided she had it coming so he was only sentenced to a few years and he's been out for two or three.

Anybody else know any murdering farmers?

There was a similar situation to that in a village near where I gre up. Denshaw.

The farmer offed his wife and the bloke she was seeing.

Another murdering Farmer was "Tony Martin".

[BlasterBates]

I killed a rather irritating neighbour last year and as usual I got away with it.
I used an axe this time, very messy and wouldn't recommend it.