Times where you nearly 'bought the farm', had things been slightly different

[vetran]

Why don't you Walter Mitties wait for FLC to post his f***ing experiences?

FTFY

[Lockhouse]

When I was 19 I got hit by a car whilst crossing the road. I went straight through the windscreen, then got flipped over the top, landing around 30 feet down the road. Still have issues with the injuries sustained 35 years later.

The moral of this story is; never wear sunglasses at night.

[FatLazyContractor]

When I was 19 I got hit by a car whilst crossing the road. I went straight through the windscreen, then got flipped over the top, landing around 30 feet down the road. Still have issues with the injuries sustained 35 years later.

The moral of this story is; never wear sunglasses at night.

Who was wearing sunglasses in your story?

[WTFH]

I was flying back from Italy several years ago when we hit some turbulence. It was just as the trolley dolly was serving out spaghetti Bolognese which she managed to spill onto her fat gut. Anyway, she was a big Marillion Fan, and told me to say that it wasn't turbulence but a tornado blowing through that caused the accident.


I laughed so hard I almost shat myself to death.

[oracleslave]

When I was 19 I got hit by a car whilst crossing the road. I went straight through the windscreen, then got flipped over the top, landing around 30 feet down the road. Still have issues with the injuries sustained 35 years later.

The moral of this story is; never wear sunglasses at night.

Did you jump onto the windscreen as it hit you. How come you didn't just end up under the grille?

[Lockhouse]

Did you jump onto the windscreen as it hit you. How come you didn't just end up under the grille?

At the last moment i saw the car and reacted which probably saved my life.

[d000hg]

I was flying back from Italy several years ago when we hit some turbulence. It was just as the trolley dolly was serving out spaghetti Bolognese which she managed to spill onto her fat gut. Anyway, she was a big Marillion Fan, and told me to say that it wasn't turbulence but a tornado blowing through that caused the accident.


I laughed so hard I almost shat myself to death.

I was flying back from Finland the other day and the silly stewardess had given me so much single malt it spilled when we hit turbulence.

[OwlHoot]

Only close call I was aware of was a massive oak tree keeling over about 20 feet behind me in a Autumn gale.

Probably weighed a good 500 tons, as the four foot thick trunk was totally water logged, and it landed with a terrific crash!

[MarillionFan]

Why don't you Walter Mitties wait for MF to post his flying experiences?

I was almost killed on a plane journey recently.

I was flying on a Malaysian flight MH370 when about an hour in when they ran out of Champers. I had a slight disagreement with the cabin crew and so told them not to worry and I'd bail out & get some. So I took the life jacket from under the seat and a large jacket from a fat lady next to me. Opening the door I leapt out.

Well it was bloody windy I can tell you, but the jacket acted as a parachute and I landed in some shallow water in Borneo, right next to a 7-11. Well imagine my bloody surprise when I found they didn't have champers and I had to do with a bottle of cheap red wine.

Also they lost my bloody luggage. Only flew with them once more, in Russia last year. I was so pissed I don't remember the flight and woke up on the back of a tractor near Minsk.

[FatLazyContractor]

and I landed in some shallow water in Borneo, right next to a 7-11. Well imagine my bloody surprise when I found they didn't have champers and I had to do with a bottle of cheap red wine. .

Let me guess, you survived, because both fat and turd float on water