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Reply to: Columbian hostages

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Previously on "Columbian hostages"

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  • TimberWolf
    replied
    Originally posted by shaunbhoy View Post
    No, you will have been transported to the camp by people who know where they are going, where they have been, and how to survive in a jungle environment. If you imagine that tropical jungles are warm cosy places with ripe bunches of juicy edible fruit fairly bursting to land in your hungry lap, and tender succulent deer just waiting to be slaughtered by hand, then you better hope you never get kidnapped and marooned there. You could read up on the advice about how to survive there, however that might take some time. Alternatively, just do what most sensible people on the forum do and take a contrary stance to any of the gibberish that a shiny@rsed pencil-pusher like sasguru spouts and you won't go far wrong.
    He failed the medical for the Girl Guides so he is hardly made of the stuff that survives jungle ordeals. Most wouldn't back him in a 3-round bout with Posh Spice!!

    Jungles aren't the places of death that you make them out to be IMO. I wouldn't want to be carrying other people out, but on my own it would have to be an improbably impenetrable and hostile place not to get out. It might even be good fun.

    Leave a comment:


  • shaunbhoy
    replied
    Originally posted by TimberWolf View Post
    . You're unlikely have been transported to the camp by air
    No, you will have been transported to the camp by people who know where they are going, where they have been, and how to survive in a jungle environment. If you imagine that tropical jungles are warm cosy places with ripe bunches of juicy edible fruit fairly bursting to land in your hungry lap, and tender succulent deer just waiting to be slaughtered by hand, then you better hope you never get kidnapped and marooned there. You could read up on the advice about how to survive there, however that might take some time. Alternatively, just do what most sensible people on the forum do and take a contrary stance to any of the gibberish that a shiny@rsed pencil-pusher like sasguru spouts and you won't go far wrong.
    He failed the medical for the Girl Guides so he is hardly made of the stuff that survives jungle ordeals. Most wouldn't back him in a 3-round bout with Posh Spice!!

    Leave a comment:


  • TimberWolf
    replied
    Originally posted by OwlHoot View Post
    Sorry TimberWolf, but assuming you weren't being ironic, that reply bears out Shaunbhoy's point.

    The trouble is jungles normally are anything but teaming with food, especially during the day, and what little there is needs a lot of skill to catch and knowledge of what to avoid (most plants for example).

    Also, there are no hard and fast rules for finding your way out. For example, following a stream downhill may end in a huge impassable waterfall or more likely it will peter out into a dangerous and equally impenetrable swamp.

    Also, yomping through the jungle you'll be losing water and salt by the bucket load, and getting scratched to ribbons.

    I imagine jungles contain more food than any other environment, but with a bit of luck eating won't be a big issue. You're unlikely have been transported to the camp by air, so a trail already exists that you can backtrack down 10x faster than a bunch of people hacking their through initially while towing a bunch of winging hostages; plus being chased speeds one up a bit. You could be back in the hotel by supper. I'm not sure of the percentages involved in reaching an impenetrable swamp versus safety, but following streams and rivers is the usual advice.

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  • OwlHoot
    replied
    Originally posted by TimberWolf View Post
    2004

    What's the big deal with the jungle fear thing anyway, surely it's a piece of cake walking/rafting out of a wilderness teaming with food and water ...
    Sorry TimberWolf, but assuming you weren't being ironic, that reply bears out Shaunbhoy's point.

    The trouble is jungles normally are anything but teaming with food, especially during the day, and what little there is needs a lot of skill to catch and knowledge of what to avoid (most plants for example).

    Also, there are no hard and fast rules for finding your way out. For example, following a stream downhill may end in a huge impassable waterfall or more likely it will peter out into a dangerous and equally impenetrable swamp.

    Also, yomping through the jungle you'll be losing water and salt by the bucket load, and getting scratched to ribbons.

    Leave a comment:


  • TimberWolf
    replied
    Originally posted by Pondlife View Post
    I wasn't here/there at the time but I guess that this is the origin



    http://cuk.yuku.com/topic/1020/t/Colombian-Hostages.html
    2004

    What's the big deal with the jungle fear thing anyway, surely it's a piece of cake walking/rafting out of a wilderness teaming with food and water, and where spiders and big cats make good eating when you're lucky enough to stumble across them. If it was desert or in the middle of hostile territory swarming with baddies, then I might stay put unless the food and accommodation were below par.

    Leave a comment:


  • Pondlife
    replied
    I wasn't here/there at the time but I guess that this is the origin



    http://cuk.yuku.com/topic/1020/t/Colombian-Hostages.html

    Leave a comment:


  • sasguru
    replied
    Originally posted by shaunbhoy View Post
    There was little need. I simply pointed out that you were not in any position to judge. And as you singularly failed to comprehend my response you further reiterated the point. Do try and keep up knucklehead.

    There, there SB.
    You can have the Chief Village Idiot job with the retirement of CyberCretin.

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  • shaunbhoy
    replied
    Originally posted by oracleslave View Post
    Good to see you didn't bother denying your physical and intellectual ineptitude.
    There was little need. I simply pointed out that you were not in any position to judge. And as you singularly failed to comprehend my response you further reiterated the point. Do try and keep up knucklehead.

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  • oracleslave
    replied
    Originally posted by shaunbhoy View Post
    wibble
    Good to see you didn't bother denying your physical and intellectual ineptitude.

    Leave a comment:


  • shaunbhoy
    replied
    Originally posted by oracleslave View Post
    The thought of you having either the physique or intellect to deal with anything other than breathing is laughable
    But you are from Seth Effriker, so anything to do with intellect and physical ability is hardly state of the art. You mob don't even seem to be able to figure out gender mapping in your athletics teams, and as for the list of Great South African Achievements, you have not progressed much past biltong!!

    A nation of jellyheaded racists who can be taught nothing useful that a Tamarind Monkey cannot perfect in half the time.
    Stick to eye-gouging, you are good at that!

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  • oracleslave
    replied
    Originally posted by shaunbhoy View Post
    All part of the service!

    The thought of you having either the physique or intellect to deal with anything other than breathing is laughable

    Leave a comment:


  • shaunbhoy
    replied
    Originally posted by sasguru View Post
    I suppose you think staying would be the grown-up option?
    "staying" was the option that all bar one chose. You know, the option that all the ones that were released unharmed chose? Is the penny dropping yet?

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  • sasguru
    replied
    Originally posted by DaveB View Post
    It's nice to see how people grow and mature over the years, isn't it
    I suppose you think staying would be the grown-up option?

    Leave a comment:


  • shaunbhoy
    replied
    Originally posted by sasguru View Post
    Poor SB. The usual torrent of ..........
    .......flawless logic that you have no credible retort to. Cue sg responding with some witless comment relating to intellectual capacity. Sad but highly predictable.

    sg..............Mr MustTryHarder personified.

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  • shaunbhoy
    replied
    Originally posted by oracleslave View Post
    Coffee/keyboard moment. Smilies should have been after this line.
    All part of the service!

    Leave a comment:

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