Originally posted by Churchill
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Reply to: Have YOU ever done anything unhygienic
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Previously on "Have YOU ever done anything unhygienic"
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Originally posted by EternalOptimist View PostEO - 'Saaaarrrrge'
Hard as fck Sergeant - 'What now you scouse cnt'
EO - 'Saaarrrge, where's the bog paper?'
HaFS - 'Here, look - thats yer bog roll' (pointing to a small square of paper the size of a postage stamp)
EO - 'Saaarge, that wouldn't even cover me starfish'
HaFS -'You dont wipe your @arse with it. Fold it twice and use it to clean under yer fingernail'
- you need a square piece of paper
- fold it in half
- fold it in half the other way
- tear out the corner bit so that when it opens there is a hole in the middle
- put your finger through the middle
- insert into oriface and use fingers on outside of paper to get between the cheeks clean
- as you pull the paper off, wipe finger
- use the little bit you tore out to scrape under the fingernail
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Just dropped a boiled sweet on the hotel room carpet after unwrapping it. Picked it up, no hairs, popped into mouth.
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Originally posted by Churchill View PostThat would be stale urine. Only fresh urine should be used for wounds. The Romans (What did they ever do for us?) used stale urine as a bleach.
Another use for fresh urine - thawing out a frozen door lock on an old Mini., so that the key will turn.
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Originally posted by Drewster View Post<Pause waiting for loads of Flames from "Real Men" who pish down their trousers/wipe thier hands on their shirt/pish while holding their Lunch Roll etc>Originally posted by The Lone Gunman View PostIf you dont piss on your hands and you keep your tackle clean then there is no need to wash.
Presumably Gunslinger doesn't need to wash his hands after a Tulip either... cos he uses paper!!
Or possibly if its a hard Tulip its not worth even wiping!!!
:despairing head shaking smilie:
Remind me if we ever meet:
a) Not to shake hands with you
b) Not to share food with you
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Originally posted by The Lone Gunman View PostIf you dont piss on your hands and you keep your tackle clean then there is no need to wash.
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I was off into the ooloo once in the army. Kit stripped down to the bare minimum so we could carry more water and ammo.
wrappers off tins, handle sawed off the toothbrush, one half of a boot brush etc etc.
EO - 'Saaaarrrrge'
Hard as fck Sergeant - 'What now you scouse cnt'
EO - 'Saaarrrge, where's the bog paper?'
HaFS - 'Here, look - thats yer bog roll' (pointing to a small square of paper the size of a postage stamp)
EO - 'Saaarge, that wouldn't even cover me starfish'
HaFS -'You dont wipe your @arse with it. Fold it twice and use it to clean under yer fingernail'
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Originally posted by The Lone Gunman View PostIf you dont piss on your hands and you keep your tackle clean then there is no need to wash.
So when you're finished a pee, you don't think there might be a bit of post pish drippage in your pants later, meaning your willy might pick some of that drippage up, and next time you go for a slash and whip out your whanger, you still not washing afterwards?
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Originally posted by Drewster View PostAre you implying that you don't wash your hands after a pish without someone having to "remind" you............
<Pause waiting for loads of Flames from "Real Men" who pish down their trousers/wipe thier hands on their shirt/pish while holding their Lunch Roll etc>
PS - Your whole knob......... Do they call you stumpy!!
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Originally posted by alreadypacked View PostSo I was told, a few months back. I guess it is still on, otherwise he would be back. There is always the possibility he has a sockpuppet now
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Originally posted by cailin maith View PostNo way.... is he? Crikey!
So I was told, a few months back. I guess it is still on, otherwise he would be back. There is always the possibility he has a sockpuppet now
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Originally posted by alreadypacked View PostXen is back with his old gf, so he doesn't have to vent on here
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Originally posted by centurian View PostHad a GF who always insisted that I wash my hands after having a pee - without fail.
However, a few hours later, she was more than happy to put my whole knob in her mouth, lick it, such it and swallow down what came out of it.
Never could quite work out that inconsistency... and I certainly wasn't going to point it out to her...
<Pause waiting for loads of Flames from "Real Men" who pish down their trousers/wipe thier hands on their shirt/pish while holding their Lunch Roll etc>
PS - Your whole knob......... Do they call you stumpy!!
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Originally posted by EternalOptimist View Postsoz Cojak, still working on my Diver joke.
I, too , wonder where xen is
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