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Reply to: How Married are you ?
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Previously on "How Married are you ?"
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Originally posted by SallyAnne View PostAh no - not my hubby.
But we've had 4 couples (really really close to both of us) split over the last 2 years, and at the time it was because it "just wasn't working out" etc etc, but in time we've learnt that each one of the blokes has f*kcing cheated!!
And these are all couples who've been together for like 10+ years, with kids. The kind of proper established couples who always seemed happy.
In any case why blame the bloke. If women didn't help the bloke cheat then they wouldn't
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Originally posted by lilelvis2000 View PostShe was too busy writing down details from two young lads. Man! they were fine! (the boobs not the guys)
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Originally posted by NotAllThere View PostProbably unhappy that she's not getting enough sex from you.
Why not tell her that you are at the end of your tether, and that if she doesn't come to relate to try to sort things out, you're leaving?
Or get her sectioned.
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Originally posted by thelace View PostShe had a hysterectomy 6 years ago, which mean her hormones are unballanced. I know this and make allowances. But certainly for the last 3 years, she's been filled with anger most of the time.
I can never do enough for her. I cook 2 - 3 times a week, keep on top of the washing, stack the dishwasher, often do the ironing, keeping on top of the DIY, etc, etc....
The kids can never do enough (they're teenegers for goodness sake, their rooms aren't likely to look like a showhouse). They are pretty good kids (not perfect, but who'd want them to be?), and they never bring mates home unless mummy is grumpy
I've suggested relate, but she says there's nothing wrong, she's happy....
She's stormed out of the house 3 times recently "I'm the only one who does anything in this house, nobody helps me" sort of thing. I've started thinking "well don't come back then"! This is not healthy in a marriage.
I'm currently only staying there for the kids, but I'm not sure it does them any good to see their parents arguing all the time!
Why not tell her that you are at the end of your tether, and that if she doesn't come to relate to try to sort things out, you're leaving?
Or get her sectioned.
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Yup, 17 days in to marriage so far, but after nearly 20 years together, marriage isn't a tradition for us...it's something done for love and specialness to each other.
We got married for ourselves, on our own terms, which is why it was a very private ceremony, with no one else invited (apart from the priest and 2 witnesseses)
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Originally posted by SallyAnne View Post
Ah you poor thing - that sounds horrible
Is there any way you can send her away for a little while? Pay for her to go on one of those womans retreat spa camp things for a fortnight or something - maybe the whole household woudl benefit from a bit of space from each other?
And if you can suggest that you both take that 2 weeks to write a list of all the things you're not happy with too, as a starting point for when she gets back?
It's so sad when things fall apart - I'm always convinced the love doesn't go entirely.
I hope it all works out for you x x
Couple of weeks later took the boys away for a "boys weekend", that also gave her a break. Planning on doing that again.
I'll also suggest the list stuff and be on my best behaviour (i.e. not argue back, not even once) while we do it.
I think I'll give it one last stab before working on the exit route! I owe her that...
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Originally posted by Rookie View PostOnly if she saw you.
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Originally posted by thelace View PostShe had a hysterectomy 6 years ago, which mean her hormones are unballanced. I know this and make allowances. But certainly for the last 3 years, she's been filled with anger most of the time.
I can never do enough for her. I cook 2 - 3 times a week, keep on top of the washing, stack the dishwasher, often do the ironing, keeping on top of the DIY, etc, etc....
The kids can never do enough (they're teenegers for goodness sake, their rooms aren't likely to look like a showhouse). They are pretty good kids (not perfect, but who'd want them to be?), and they never bring mates home unless mummy is grumpy
I've suggested relate, but she says there's nothing wrong, she's happy....
She's stormed out of the house 3 times recently "I'm the only one who does anything in this house, nobody helps me" sort of thing. I've started thinking "well don't come back then"! This is not healthy in a marriage.
I'm currently only staying there for the kids, but I'm not sure it does them any good to see their parents arguing all the time!
Although it sounds a bit daft - but you can go to Relate by yourself. If she knows you are worried enough to want to see someone then she might get her ass in gear too.
Hope it works out.
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Originally posted by thelace View PostShe had a hysterectomy 6 years ago, which mean her hormones are unballanced. I know this and make allowances. But certainly for the last 3 years, she's been filled with anger most of the time.
I can never do enough for her. I cook 2 - 3 times a week, keep on top of the washing, stack the dishwasher, often do the ironing, keeping on top of the DIY, etc, etc....
The kids can never do enough (they're teenegers for goodness sake, their rooms aren't likely to look like a showhouse). They are pretty good kids (not perfect, but who'd want them to be?), and they never bring mates home unless mummy is grumpy
I've suggested relate, but she says there's nothing wrong, she's happy....
She's stormed out of the house 3 times recently "I'm the only one who does anything in this house, nobody helps me" sort of thing. I've started thinking "well don't come back then"! This is not healthy in a marriage.
I'm currently only staying there for the kids, but I'm not sure it does them any good to see their parents arguing all the time!
I was a child in that sort of scenario. It was enough to deter me from thinking of marriage for decades. Strangely enough though, my parents are still together.
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