Reply to: Bored at work?? Have a meeting... Noooo

[NickFitz]

I like your style... did you work there much longer after that?

Yup

[Moose423956]

Say you're having your period.


Edit:...and you don't want to bleed all over the meeting room.

[NickFitz]

Ex-clientcorp once had a company-wide meeting, held on the floor where I worked. About five to one, the place started filling up with permies.

On the stroke of one I got up, put on my coat and headed for the door, incidentally passing the CEO as she came walking in to address the masses.

This alone seemed to confuse some of the permies. They were even more taken aback when I returned twenty minutes later, sat at my desk with my back to the ongoing presentation, and proceeded to eat a Fuzzy's roast dinner whilst reading CUK

[Lockhouse]

I had a client meeting today at the other office for 14:30 so I thought I could sneak home early. It's just been moved to 16:00

[oracleslave]

R

Better go, I have a meeting in 5.

That's alright, we'll touch base later so I can give you the list of actions you picked up during your absence.

[mailric]

Right, this is tried and tested. Don't tell anyone else as it won't work...

- Set your phone alarm tone for 5 past the hour.
- Turn up, wait 5 minutes.
- Your phone goes off.
- Stand up looking embarrased and mutter "sorry, important call. its Jenkins (or any other important sounding name)
- Grab a pen and paper and scuttle off out of the room
- Now go for a coffee, fag, local strip joint, whatever.
- Duck back into the room 5 mins before the meeting is due to end, remember to raise your eyebrows as if you've just had a really hard and tiring important call from the boss
- Meeting ends

You've attended the meeting, skipped the boring parts and made sure you werent there long enough to take any actions.

Better go, I have a meeting in 5.

[TykeMerc]

In an emergency situation like this set off the Fire Alarms or get an anonymous PAYG sim and phone in a bomb/anthrax/nerve gas threat.

There's a risk that the meeting wil get held outside in the emergency assembly area though so slink off to the pub.

[the_rangdo]

Why give a reason? If the invite gives you the option of accept/decline just pick the one you want.

Then 5 mins before the meeting go for a carp or something

[DaveB]

Send a reply to the invite syaing your glad to have been included as it will give you a chance to put forward your proposals for a Christian approach to solving project issues and the inclusion of Prayer in the project management methodolgy.

Although depending on the client the latter may already be unofficially implemented.

[FiveTimes]

Suggestions for declining client team meetings..... Anyone???? Basically just can't be a**ed...

Mention that you've been constipated for a while and you think that the laxatives are starting to work and then quickly leg it to trap 4. Stay there for a while whilst playing on your phone

[chef]

just turn to the nearest person and say in an agressive tone

"what do you mean i hear voices?"

stand up and walk out

[badger7579]

Heart attack, wind, fainting... All good so far... Any more cracking ideas

[TimberWolf]

Initiate a mass fainting event.

[basshead]

Say you've got really bad wind and it wouldn't be fair on the other participants.

[chef]

fake a heart attack, take the rest of the day off