Reply to: the not so nice things you have done thread

[TheFaQQer]

I wasn't allowed to stay up to watch it.....

What's happened to your avatar, Carling?

[sasguru]

"The upside is when I pulled I still liked them the next day"

So you're single then

It's alright, baggy's lent me his life partner. She deflates after use and doesn't answer back.

[BoredBloke]

"The upside is when I pulled I still liked them the next day"

So you're single then

[DBA_bloke]

I saw V, not a pretty outcome that those mutant little lizard tongue babies.

Hmmm... I have got a tail, and often fancy eating people. I had put it down to the weather, but not so sure, now.

[cailin maith]

I saw V, not a pretty outcome that those mutant little lizard tongue babies.

I wasn't allowed to stay up to watch it.....

[snaw]

Just be grateful I'm not your dad, or more likely, your grandad...

I saw V, not a pretty outcome that those mutant little lizard tongue babies.

[DBA_bloke]

I could have been, but Sas beat me up the stairs!!!

sasguru is sterile and can't get it up anyway, so I think I'm safe on that score.

[daviejones]

Oh God!

I could have been, but Sas beat me up the stairs!!!

[FiveTimes]

I've never believed these "I woke up with a munter much below my standards" stories. The fact is you fancied her on some level, and if you were so pissed you couldn't see at all the night before, it's unlikely your performance was up to much.

Like the old saying... "I've never been to bed with an ugly woman, but I've woken up with one or two..."

Agree ample cleavage helps, and its only in the morning that it wasn't just that that was ample.

[sasguru]

I'm guessing the combination of excessive beer consumption, youthful male hormones and dimly lit nightclubs didn't feature much in your life. I think cleavage usually has a role to play as well.

Not much of a drinker I guess. The upside is when I pulled I still liked them the next day .

[DBA_bloke]

Is DavieJones your dad?

Oh God!

[TheFaQQer]

You bastard! That was my Mum!

Is DavieJones your dad?

[DBA_bloke]

I've never believed these "I woke up with a munter much below my standards" stories. The fact is you fancied her on some level, and if you were so pissed you couldn't see at all the night before, it's unlikely your performance was up to much.

sasguru: You've been similarly rebuffed in the morning by a big, beefy man that you thought, for the umpteenth time, would be "the one", haven't you? Your bitter words speak volumes. Try being a bit less easy, and lose a few pounds, love. It'll all work out in the end, I'm sure. Best of luck.

[Bagpuss]

He doesn't believe the stories because he hasn't much experience with pulling the opposite sex.

[cailin maith]

On the farm we plugged up the electric fence to stop the cows going into one half of the field. We didn't know if it was working and nobody wanted to touch it to check. So I shouted the dog over. It saw this bright orange wire it hadn't seen before and, with her wet nose, sniffed it. She got a shock and because she thought we were her friends, tried to jump to us, on the other side of the fence. The fence promptly collapsed around her and she started a dog form of body popping. After a while we unplugged her, safe in the knowledge that our fence was working. She died shortly after, but she was 14.

thats just cruel.....