Reply to: Divorce - Details of a good lawyer

[h8mmer]

You should have thought of that before you had children! You have a responsibilty to your little girl, if that means you need to work and not travel, well so be it IMHO.

WHS...

[JamJarST]

Well I want to setup my own business in the future so when i start I wont even be contracting so I dont want to be locked into an arrangement to pay 15% and then my immediate salary falls to nothing and im still paying the same amount. Also I like to travel but have only contracted for 2 years and want to take an extended break some time next year. So I want the 15% to be what it says not an amount that forces me into working to sustain. If I was a permie I would earn half of what I do now and so as a contractor I want more of a balanced life style.

You should have thought of that before you had children! You have a responsibilty to your little girl, if that means you need to work and not travel, well so be it IMHO.

[malvolio]

Good spot - you got me there.

There's a firm in Cardiff called "Loosemore"...

[simondolan]

I thought it was Payne and Fears...

Payne & Fears

Good spot - you got me there.

[Mojito]

Short Marriage

Less than 5 years will be considered a short marriage by the courts so will have a bearing on the settlement. Your equity split, which will include ££ in the company but ONLY the increase during the marriage, will be influenced by this.

Can you be clear on what your war chest was at the start of the marriage - this is important!!

You'll still not get a 50/50 split of assets appreciated during the course of the marriage coz of the kid, but Spousal Maintenance for a 2 or 3.5 year marriage (worst case if she does not agree you separated a while ago) is optimistic on her part to say the least. As per previous advice, clean break from her is paramount, do not fall into the 'nominal spousal maintenance' trap no matter how innocuous it may seem.

Oh and if you've not filed for divorce yet, look into which courts are more fair. Principle registry (London) is very pro-wife. My split was worked out in the midlands (her choice) and my London-base solicitor was quite taken aback at how the rules were evenly applies compared to the London mob.

Good luck!

[Random]

thanks for responses, all very useful.

Why does it have to be so complicated?

If you went to a bank for a mortgage they'd ask for 3 years account, calculate your average income and then lend on that basis. Why on earth does holiday, bench, day off sick etc have to be calculated when it occurs. Base it on previous income like everyone else and do a fixed amount. Just manage your finances.

Well I want to setup my own business in the future so when i start I wont even be contracting so I dont want to be locked into an arrangement to pay 15% and then my immediate salary falls to nothing and im still paying the same amount. Also I like to travel but have only contracted for 2 years and want to take an extended break some time next year. So I want the 15% to be what it says not an amount that forces me into working to sustain. If I was a permie I would earn half of what I do now and so as a contractor I want more of a balanced life style.

Assuming mediation doesn't work for you I'd always keep in mind that when money is involved people change big time so make sure whatever you do is agreed in writing - I had many verbal agreements with my X only for every one to change when in court because she scented blood in teh water.

Is she after spousal maintenance? If so the best advice is to go for a clean break agreement, she'll get more up front (I had to agree to 80% of the large amount of equity in our house + part of my pension) but it meant that whatever I earned was mine to keep and if benched I wouldn't have to panic how to pay each month.

Here is the issue, we were married for 2 years but now separated for 1.5 years and I think she might want spousal maintenance which I think is insane. We have no house and its something like this, in fact this specifically that I dont know whether I should dig in on. For such a short time together it seems very strange I would be paying spousal maintenance at all. Although maybe im not well informed on how this works.

[northernladuk]

Slaughter and May. Huge firm - based in London. No idea if they do divorce law, but still the best name for a firm of solicitors ever!

I thought it was Payne and Fears...

Payne & Fears

[simondolan]

Slaughter and May. Huge firm - based in London. No idea if they do divorce law, but still the best name for a firm of solicitors ever!

[THEPUMA]

Keith Docking - SA Law. Based in St Albans.

PUMA

[MarillionFan]

one daughter (4), so not so straightforward as need to determine 15% of my net and what happens when im benched or take a holiday etc as the ex wants a consistent income which for a contractor is difficult.

Why does it have to be so complicated?

If you went to a bank for a mortgage they'd ask for 3 years account, calculate your average income and then lend on that basis. Why on earth does holiday, bench, day off sick etc have to be calculated when it occurs. Base it on previous income like everyone else and do a fixed amount. Just manage your finances.

[h8mmer]

thanks


well she gets legal aid so no issue and doesnt pay for mediation - i pay full wack however! I just want to be fair but if she throws a curve ball I want to have options... in the end she is looking for me to pay a fixed sum per month and if im benched that isnt going to work so well my end! Any lawyers contacts in London that have been useful would be well received.

Assuming mediation doesn't work for you I'd always keep in mind that when money is involved people change big time so make sure whatever you do is agreed in writing - I had many verbal agreements with my X only for every one to change when in court because she scented blood in teh water.

Is she after spousal maintenance? If so the best advice is to go for a clean break agreement, she'll get more up front (I had to agree to 80% of the large amount of equity in our house + part of my pension) but it meant that whatever I earned was mine to keep and if benched I wouldn't have to panic how to pay each month.

Also, if you agree to even a minimal amount of spousal maintenence because you are being amicable this can come back to bite you on the backside if she later decide to take you to court for more - if you live in London then family judges seem to be quite keen on spousal maintenance.
I know of one divorcing wife's solicitor who tried sneaking through a 5p annual spousal maintenance figure "to show ammicability" with that exact intention in mind. If solicitors are the devils children then family solicitors are the unwanted black sheep of that family, there is no low they will not stoop too..

However, regardless of the financial split with your wife you'll still have to rightly pay for your child unless you intend to become the main carer (or PWC). As you'll find on this site, and many others, the advice with this is to be as amicable as possible with your STBX and agree a figure between you in a private agreement - you do not want the CSA in your life if at all possible.

Best of British, remember there is light at the end of the tunnel (although it'll feel like a blooming long tunnel as you travel through it!!)

[Underscore Pt2]

Base it on what you "earn" in a year. ie what you pay yourself. and then add a bit more on top to keep her sweet - that way she should be happy to give you what you want.

[SteelyDan]

can someone let me know a good legal contact for a London based contractor?

Divorce=messy/painful/costly/life-changing, but as for a 'good lawyer', well this is subjective, and you'll only know if they've been 'good' once the process has been gone through. Despite this, I'm not sure what would constitute 'good' anyway - if you're looking for 'much cheapness' then be prepared for a long search - lawyers don't do cheapness. There's a legal process of course with certain rules - it's called Family Law.

If you are both determined to go down this (divorce) route (& I would strongly recommend you think again) then be prepared for it to be a costly exercise, in more ways than one.

[BrilloPad]

one daughter (4), so not so straightforward as need to determine 15% of my net and what happens when im benched or take a holiday etc as the ex wants a consistent income which for a contractor is difficult.

The most important thing is getting access to your daughter and making sure that she comes out of this as best she can. How do you plan to do that?

I hope you can convince your wife to be reasonable for the sake of your daughter. Unfortunately you never truly know someone until you divorce them.

In general for finances divide the money 50/50. Give one half to the lawyers.

Why are you getting divorced? Is there any way you can patch up the relationship with your wife? I strongly urge you to do whatever it takes.

[Random]

Are there any children involved or is it just money you need help with?

one daughter (4), so not so straightforward as need to determine 15% of my net and what happens when im benched or take a holiday etc as the ex wants a consistent income which for a contractor is difficult.