Originally posted by northernladuk
View Post
- Visitors can check out the Forum FAQ by clicking this link. You have to register before you can post: click the REGISTER link above to proceed. To start viewing messages, select the forum that you want to visit from the selection below. View our Forum Privacy Policy.
- Want to receive the latest contracting news and advice straight to your inbox? Sign up to the ContractorUK newsletter here. Every sign up will also be entered into a draw to WIN £100 Amazon vouchers!
Please put more jokes here
Collapse
X
Collapse
-
The greatest trick the devil ever pulled was convincing the world that he didn't exist -
Jesus once said "He who lives by the sword will die by the sword"
He was a carpenter that died by being nailed to a piece of wood, so he might have had a point.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
Me: Doc my hands and feet stop working when i watch homosexual porn. What's wrong with me?
Doctor: I'd say you might have gay tendon sieze.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
Marriage is when a man and woman become as one;
the trouble starts when they try to decide which one.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
What would you do if you wanted to know how many bees Noah had?
Check the Ark Hives.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
-
Lying in bed, my wife asked what I'd most like to do to her body. I said identify it.“The period of the disintegration of the European Union has begun. And the first vessel to have departed is Britain”Comment
-
An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar.
The Englishman wanted to go so they all had to leave.Comment
-
-
Roy Hodgson has just been made prime minister
He has a fantastic record of leaving Europe swiftly.Comment
-
Comment
- Home
- News & Features
- First Timers
- IR35 / S660 / BN66
- Employee Benefit Trusts
- Agency Workers Regulations
- MSC Legislation
- Limited Companies
- Dividends
- Umbrella Company
- VAT / Flat Rate VAT
- Job News & Guides
- Money News & Guides
- Guide to Contracts
- Successful Contracting
- Contracting Overseas
- Contractor Calculators
- MVL
- Contractor Expenses
Advertisers
Contractor Services
CUK News
- Streamline Your Retirement with iSIPP: A Solution for Contractor Pensions Sep 1 09:13
- Making the most of pension lump sums: overview for contractors Sep 1 08:36
- Umbrella company tribunal cases are opening up; are your wages subject to unlawful deductions, too? Aug 31 08:38
- Contractors, relabelling 'labour' as 'services' to appear 'fully contracted out' won't dupe IR35 inspectors Aug 31 08:30
- How often does HMRC check tax returns? Aug 30 08:27
- Work-life balance as an IT contractor: 5 top tips from a tech recruiter Aug 30 08:20
- Autumn Statement 2023 tipped to prioritise mental health, in a boost for UK workplaces Aug 29 08:33
- Final reminder for contractors to respond to the umbrella consultation (closing today) Aug 29 08:09
- Top 5 most in demand cyber security contract roles Aug 25 08:38
- Changes to the right to request flexible working are incoming, but how will contractors be affected? Aug 24 08:25
Comment