Please put more jokes here

[WTFH]

"Babe, is it in?"


"Yeah"


"Does it hurt?"


"Uh huh"


"Let me put it in slowly"


"It still hurts"


"OK, let's try another shoe size"

[WTFH]

You know beauty comes in all shapes and sizes - small, large, circular, square, thin crust, thick crust, stuffed crust...

[WTFH]

I went for an interview at a big IT company yesterday. The role was "Computer Hacking Investigator". After the usual small talk, the ClientCo manager asked me "So, what makes you suitable for this job?" to which I replied "I hacked your computer and invited myself for this interview"

[BrilloPad]

3 old people are talking.

1. My ambition is to be able to have a really big wee.
2. My ambition is to have a really big poo.
3. I have a really big wee and poo at 7am every day. My ambition is to wake up before 7am....

[LondonManc]

Donald Trump is now odds-on favourite to win the upcoming Presidential election after announcing that, if elected, he will attempt to jump all the Kardashians in a steamroller.

[kaiser78]

I went for an interview at a big IT company yesterday. The role was "Computer Hacking Investigator". After the usual small talk, the ClientCo manager asked me "So, what makes you suitable for this job?" to which I replied "I hacked your computer and invited myself for this interview"

"I hacked your computer and created this role"

[WTFH]

Please put more jokes here

London mayor tells joke about health secretary...

http://www.huffingtonpost.co.uk/entr...b01e35922bc00c

[LondonManc]

You're invited to an event to discuss difficulties people have in reaching orgasm.
If you can't come, let us know.

[LondonManc]

A mathematician was sent to the shop by his wife with the instruction:

"Get a loaf of bread. And, if they have eggs, get a dozen."

The mathematician duly came back from the shop with twelve loaves of bread.

Wife: "Why did you buy 12 loaves of bread?"

Mathematician: "They had eggs."

[LondonManc]

A Roman walks into a bar, holds up two fingers, and says ”Five pints of lager, please."