My mate said, "Do you think wormholes exist?"
I said, "Of course, where else do you think they poop from?"
I said, "Of course, where else do you think they poop from?"
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Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much. -
too true
As the delays into the publication of the Chilcott report continue officials have denied they are waiting until Tony Blair develops Alzheimer's before publishing.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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In an effort to conceive our first child, my girlfriend asked me how she could stop the sperm from leaking out after sex.
"That's easy," I said. "Keep your mouth shut."Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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The US Constitution does not specify how long the State of the Union address must be. You know who gave the longest State of the Union address ever? Bill Clinton.
You know who gave the shortest? George Washington. It was just a couple of minutes.
When a politician cannot tell a lie, it limits how much they can say.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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for certain posters
Daily Mail online: Masturbation may help prevent the common cold.
Hope so, I've got no tissues left.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Marriage comes from the latin for adopting an overgrown male child who cannot be handled by his parents anymore.Comment
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What's the difference between a politician and a prostitute?
Both are dishonest and will say and do anything for money. The only difference is that you f**k the prostitute and the politician f**ks you.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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The wifes just called me saying she's going into labour
I don't think a career in politics is the right move for her seeing as she's 9 months pregnant.Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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The warden asked me what I wanted for my last meal as my execution was planned for 2200 that night.
"I would like bread and wine, the same as Jesus at the last supper and please share with twelve well wishers sir, " I asked.
"Well," replied the warden, "I don't understand you wasting your last meal like that, but if that's your wish then so be it. "
"Well it worked 2,000 years ago warden, "I replied, "no harm in trying again. "Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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Tony Blair gave a speech at Oxford University this afternoon, in support of the Labour Party.
He ended it the way Blair always ends his speeches, by saying, "Thank you for listening. That'll be £200,000."Always forgive your enemies; nothing annoys them so much.Comment
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